Jiaqi’s parents never once asked about my age from start to finish. Instead, they earnestly and repeatedly pointed out Jiaqi’s flaws to me, urging me to be more tolerant.
I kept smiling and agreeing, feeling as if I were floating in midair.
I had expected it to be an awkward gathering for me, but somehow, the embarrassment inexplicably fell on Jiaqi, making me chuckle involuntarily.
His parents listed his shortcomings, and his sister teased him about his embarrassing moments—it was the first time I saw Jiaqi wear an expression of discomfort.
Today marked the beginning of my new life.
“Chenze, Jay Chou is coming to Chengdu in five days. We missed the last Richie Jen concert together, so this time, want to go?” Jiaqi asked.
“Hmm, if I have time, sure!”
*Ding-ding-ding—*
Jiaqi’s phone rang—the caller ID showed Qingyang District Police Station.
“Hello?” Jiaqi sat beside me with a smile and picked up the call. “Yes, this is Lawyer Sun. What’s the matter?”
A muffled voice came through the phone. Though I was close to Jiaqi, I couldn’t make out the words clearly.
“What…? Alright, got it. I’ll come see you first thing tomorrow. Let’s try to merge these two cases.” Jiaqi’s smile gradually faded. “Yes, I understand. Though it’s tragic for that girl, at least the perpetrator will be properly punished.”
After hanging up, Jiaqi looked troubled. A few seconds later, he turned and gave me a meaningful glance.
We stepped onto the balcony, and I looked at him, puzzled.
“Chenze, I don’t know if this counts as good news, but since it concerns you, I have to tell you,” Jiaqi said with a faint smile.
“What is it?”
“The police investigation found a female body buried in Butcher Ma’s backyard. After comparison, they confirmed it was a college student who went missing years ago.”
“A… college student?” My voice trembled slightly at those words.
Female college students were rare in our village.
“Yeah.” Jiaqi lit a cigarette and sighed. “Well, whether it’s good news or not, at least Butcher Ma’s death sentence is practically guaranteed now. I’ll check the details with the police tomorrow. Apparently, she’s been buried there for over a decade…”
I felt dizzy.
“Jiaqi… what… what was her name?” I asked.
“I think I heard it just now, but I didn’t catch it. They said she was a volunteer teacher.” He looked at me curiously. “Why? Do you know her?”
A volunteer college student… How could I not know her?
She was the most important beacon in my life.
Under the light of that beacon, I successfully left the village and spent the rest of my days striving for a better life.
I had never imagined that the guiding light of my path had remained there forever.
All these years… she had been buried in Butcher Ma’s backyard…
How terrified must she have been?
How hopeless?
A shiver ran through me.
In Butcher Ma’s shack, I had seen scratches covering the walls—old, deep scratches.
So that’s what they were…
Teacher Ning Wan’er… in some other reality, did you once feel the same despair as I did?
No… yours was worse.
Because you knew no one in the world would come to save you… and that you’d never escape that village.
You had to slowly accept your death. You had to stay there forever.
My lighthouse, the beacon of my life—the woman who gave me all my hope—had died in despair, like a pig, in that cramped room over a decade ago.
“Jiaqi… I… I don’t feel well…” My eyes burned, and it felt like the sky had collapsed. “I might lose it. I think I need to go home…”
“Chenze… if something’s wrong, you can tell me.” Jiaqi stared into my eyes. “I can fix anything for you.”
Fix…?
The tragedy was… nothing needed fixing anymore.
Teacher Ning Wan’er was dead, and now Butcher Ma would pay with his life. In every way, wasn’t this already resolved?
Then why did I still feel so hopeless?
*Ding—*
My phone, silent for so long, suddenly buzzed with a WeChat message.
It was from Chengcai.
“Oh? I just called the police, and they said you woke up?”
How strange—Chengcai, who never reached out, was suddenly talking to me.
But it didn’t matter. These people couldn’t affect me anymore. I’d block all their contacts right now.
I sighed and swiped left to delete the chat—but then another message came through.
After a slight hesitation, I opened it.
“Does your boyfriend know what you’re really like?”
Attached was a screenshot—a chat between Chengcai and Butcher Ma.
Butcher Ma: “City folk really know how to train their women, huh? Check this out.”
What followed were my photos.
The pictures I thought had vanished from the world now reappeared before my eyes.
Worse—there were videos, stomping every last shred of my dignity into the dirt.
It seemed I could never escape that village… that devouring village.
Can’t you just let me go?
Can’t you pretend you never knew me?
Can’t you just act like I’m already dead?!
“Chenze, what’s wrong?” Jiaqi asked, concerned. “Who texted you?”
“I—”
As he leaned in, I instantly locked my phone and stuffed it into my pocket, bumping my elbow in my haste—but I didn’t even feel the pain.
I was terrified. I couldn’t let Jiaqi see me like this. Even if the whole world saw… he absolutely must not.
“Oh…?” Jiaqi, noticing my panic, didn’t get angry—just awkward. “Sorry, Chenze. I didn’t mean to pry…”
“No… it’s not that…” I waved my hands frantically.
Since we got together, Jiaqi always took calls beside me—maybe to reassure me, maybe to make me feel secure. It was an unconscious habit.
He never hid anything from me. But now, I was the one hastily hiding my phone. It wasn’t fair to him.
“Jiaqi… it’s not what you think… I…”
I had no idea how to explain. I just wanted to cry—or scream at the world.
But I couldn’t cry.
If I did, Jiaqi would worry.
This was my problem, yet I was dragging someone else into it. That wasn’t right.
So the best choice now was to quietly go home, find a place to cry alone—just like every day of the past ten years.
“I know… I know…” Jiaqi nodded seriously. “Chenze, it’s okay. I’m not upset. Everyone has things they don’t want to share. When you’re ready to tell me, I’ll be here.”
That day, the world spun around me.
What should I do?
I don’t remember leaving Jiaqi’s place. By the time I snapped back to reality, I was standing in my living room, staring blankly at my phone.
Chengcai was calling.
If I didn’t resolve this, my life would never know peace.
I took out a voice recorder from the drawer, turned on my phone’s recording function, put it on speaker, and answered the call.
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