Chapter 208: Training the Waist

Yi Miao turned and hid inside the house. Gu Dun also carried Su Shi back into the room. Whatever kind of monster could frighten Yi Miao like this—I was a little curious.

Ma Ruoxing staggered as he picked up the two earthen eggs that had fallen to the ground, then scooped up Bai Yueming and followed into the house.

Accompanying the demonic aura was a fragrant scent. Appearing in the courtyard was a beautiful woman in green clothes—how was this a monster? She was simply a lone beauty who had emerged in the desolate mountains. Her small lips, her fluttering sleeves in the cold wind, and her graceful figure—undoubtedly a stunning beauty. Why had Yi Miao fled in panic?

The woman glanced around the courtyard before calling out to me, “Hey, have you seen a fake Taoist priest carrying a horsetail whisk?”

I squinted at her but couldn’t discern what kind of monster she was.

Gripping the jade ruler in my hand, I shook my head. “What kind of demon are you? Leave now, or I won’t be polite.” The spiritual light on the jade ruler flickered.

The woman sneered twice. “That broken ruler makes you think you’re some master? I’ll ask one more time—is that fake priest here?”

What on earth had Yi Miao done to make such a beautiful monster chase him?

I shifted slightly to the side. “What’s your name? What exactly did that fake priest do wrong? Maybe I can tell you.”

A low curse came from inside the house—Yi Miao’s voice.

The woman said, “You don’t seem like a bad person. My surname is Lian—Lian Xiaoyao. I’m here because that fake priest did something despicable, and I’m here to settle the score.”

Curious, I asked, “What despicable thing?”

Lian Xiaoyao fidgeted uncomfortably. “It’s… unspeakable.”

I moved again, blocking the doorway. “If you don’t say, I won’t let you in.”

Lian Xiaoyao stamped her foot in frustration. “I thought you were a good person, but you’re just as annoying. Fine, I’ll tell you.”

“There’s nothing to say about this! Master, you’re truly brilliant!” Yi Miao suddenly burst out from inside, trembling uncontrollably—clearly terrified of Lian Xiaoyao.

I laughed. “Well, Miss Xiaoyao, I can only help you this much.”

Seeing Yi Miao emerge, Lian Xiaoyao scolded, “You fake priest! Now, in front of this kind person, let’s talk about whether what you did was too much.”

I was intrigued. “Yi Miao, just listen to what Miss Lian has to say. Let’s hear what really happened.”

Yi Miao’s face turned ashen with anger.

After listening to Lian Xiaoyao, it turned out Yi Miao had unintentionally done something he shouldn’t have, and she had chased him relentlessly. Frankly, the matter was too embarrassing to put into words—so I won’t repeat it.

Yi Miao, his face pale, said, “I have a wonderful girlfriend at home. I won’t marry you!”

Lian Xiaoyao planted her hands on her hips and snapped, “Do you have a death wish? For me to take a liking to you is a blessing you’ve cultivated over lifetimes. If you really refuse, I’ll kill your girlfriend!”

Her words were sharp, teeth gritted—clearly someone who meant what she said.

Now I understood why Yi Miao had begged for my help. Sometimes, men really shouldn’t let their eyes wander.

Lian Xiaoyao and Yi Miao argued for hours. Yi Miao insisted he was a Taoist priest. I chimed in, “Didn’t Priest Yi say earlier that he’s a lay priest? I think he can marry.” Yi Miao shot me a glare. Lian Xiaoyao gave me a grateful look.

Yi Miao argued, “I’m a priest who vanquishes demons—I can’t marry a monster! If my master found out, he’d come down from Wudang Mountain and kill you!”

Lian Xiaoyao sneered, “If your master comes down, I’ll kill him.”

I mediated, “Why don’t you ask your master for permission? Surely he wouldn’t stand in the way of his disciple’s happiness.” Yi Miao glared at me. Lian Xiaoyao gave me another grateful look.

Yi Miao then said, “At most, I’ll live fifty years. Monsters live for centuries—that’s unfair.”

Lian Xiaoyao scoffed, “No problem. If you die, I’ll stab myself in the heart and follow you.”

I interjected, “With how fast science is advancing, some famous American scientist recently said human lifespan might extend to two hundred years by 2050.” Yi Miao glared again. Lian Xiaoyao smiled gratefully.

The standoff continued, the cold wind growing harsher as midnight approached. If this dragged on, I’d freeze into stupidity.

Finally, I summarized, “Marriage isn’t something decided in a day. Two people need time and feelings—if there’s no spark, forcing it won’t work. A forced melon isn’t sweet, and a reluctant union won’t bring happiness. If there’s no happiness, what’s the point? Better to let go and embrace your own skies.”

In the end, Yi Miao and Lian Xiaoyao reached a compromise: they’d try getting to know each other first, and if it didn’t work out, they’d reconsider.

Once the matter was settled, we went inside. Gu Dun had lit a fire, warming my hands as Lian Xiaoyao sat beside Yi Miao.

Su Shi had woken up. Yi Miao examined her and said she was possessed. I shook my head. “More likely she swallowed some kind of bug. We’ll figure out how to expel it tomorrow.”

Finally, I had a chance to speak with Yi Miao alone.

He grumbled, “Master, you’re quite the smooth talker—spouting nonsense about needing feelings in a relationship. You almost tricked me.”

I chuckled. “Priest Yi, come on. I won’t tell anyone about you peeping at someone’s bath. That little demoness is conservative and naive. If you guide her onto the right path, it’s still vanquishing evil, isn’t it?”

Yi Miao pondered for a moment before nodding. “You might have a point. But let me clarify—I only saw Lian Xiaoyao’s back. Nothing else. And there was a strange eye on her right arm.”

I asked, “Weren’t you chasing the Silver-Armored Corpse? How’d you end up here?”

Yi Miao explained, “I ran into the Flying Centipede in an old building. His master, Gu Rechang, was raising two zombies here. I sensed the zombies would cause trouble, so I came.”

Back in that old building, Yi Miao had unexpectedly appeared and dealt with the Flying Centipede, Ji Ruyue—who was indeed Gu Rechang’s disciple. And since Gu Rechang’s surname was also Gu, he must be the Taoist raising corpses here.

I grinned. “What a small world. To think we’d meet again so far away. Priest Yi, I saw the Silver-Armored Corpse in Xi’an. I wanted to call you, but I didn’t have your number. Mind giving it to me? If I see it again, I’ll let you know.”

Yi Miao scratched his head sheepishly. “Actually… last time, I lied. I was after a toad spirit, not the Silver-Armored Corpse. If the Silver-Armored Corpse showed up, I probably couldn’t handle it.”

I burst out laughing. In the end, Yi Miao gave me his number and shared an amusing story about catching the toad spirit. Apparently, the toad had transformed into an old woman carrying a basket of jars filled with delicious candies, offering them to Yi Miao. He nearly fell for it—until he noticed the toad had forgotten to change its feet, leaving them webbed.

Yi Miao had roared, “You toad spirit, daring to impersonate a grandmother? I’ll roast you alive!”

The toad reverted to its true form, croaking angrily, “Taoist Master, I’ll give you 100,000 yuan—spare me!”

But Yi Miao, treating money like dirt, ignored the bribe and subdued the toad. The jars in the basket shattered, revealing dead flies.

I couldn’t help but praise, “Priest Yi, you’re truly a master at demon-slaying. If it were me, I’d have fallen for that old woman act.”

Yi Miao rolled over, and ten stacks of cash tumbled from under the bed.

Early the next morning, Lian Xiaoyao knocked on the door, dragging Yi Miao out to “cultivate feelings.”

Watching her, I recalled Yi Miao’s words from last night—that he’d only seen her back and the strange eye on her right arm.

I studied Lian Xiaoyao closely, finding it all hard to believe.

Yet, as the saying goes, truth is stranger than fiction. Some things seem predestined—like how A meets B, or how one’s loneliness is already written in the stars.

Had I seen Lian Xiaoyao somewhere before? Rubbing my eyes, I realized—yes, I had.

Pulling Yi Miao aside, I whispered, “Behave yourself. I need to talk to Miss Lian Xiaoyao.”

She called out, “What are you two men whispering about? Are you into each other?”

I was stunned. A mountain-dwelling demoness who knew modern slang?

Lian Xiaoyao smirked. “Heh, I know how to use the internet.”

Yi Miao frowned at me. “You’ve never met her before—what’s this about?”

I grinned mysteriously. “Trust me. I won’t harm you.”

Thinking I was helping him shake her off, Yi Miao agreed.

I beckoned Lian Xiaoyao over. “The priest told me a bit. Can you tell me where you grew up? Any family left?”

Assuming this was a background check (she’d apparently watched a dating show where this happened), she replied eagerly, “I’m the only one left. I haven’t seen my parents in years—last time was when Japan surrendered. No idea if they’re even alive.”

Japan’s surrender was in 1945—nearly seventy years ago.

I pressed, “What happened in all these years?”

She shrugged. “Not much. I spent decades meditating in a cave, barely seeing anyone. Only recently did I start venturing out—and then I ran into that fake priest.”

Lian Xiaoyao seemed guileless—fierce in temper but innocent in nature. She answered everything openly. Clearly, she genuinely didn’t know.

(Note: The translation maintains the original tone, humor, and cultural context while ensuring natural English flow. Dialogue tags and descriptions are adjusted for readability without losing the original’s charm.)