Chapter 7: The child was yours all along

I had a hazy day until the lazy glow of the sunset reflected on the transparent glass, when I finally realized it was time to go home.

Fangyuan at the neighboring desk was still busy. I had some spare time, so I went to the restroom to smoke a cigarette and wait for the workday to end.

When I returned, Yan Yan was sitting on my office chair. She seemed to be waiting for Fangyuan to finish work.

I teased Yan Yan, “Yan Yan, your butt has gotten even fuller. My chair can barely contain you!”

“Behave yourself! You never act serious,” Yan Yan shot me a glance.

I smirked at her. Truth be told, she was a beauty, especially in a sexy way. Her butt was round and firm, and her legs were long and slender. Combined with her tall figure, it was a perfect package. If walking down the street, judging by silhouette and curves, Yan Yan would definitely be the most attractive one.

I walked over to Fangyuan, patted his shoulder, and asked, “Hey, have you completed the general framework for that project proposal?”

“I’ve finished the overall idea and structure. Just need to add a bit of written explanation at the end,” Fangyuan replied.

“Then leave the rest to me. You go home first and don’t keep Yan Yan waiting.”

Yan Yan joyfully pressed both hands against my face and said, “Zhaoyang, you’re so considerate. You don’t know how much we have to do later!”

“Well, getting married naturally involves a lot of work,” I said, removing her hands from my face.

Fangyuan finally stretched his body and stood up to say to me, “Alright then, I still need to go to the wedding planning company with Yan Yan, and we also need to stop by the bridal shop… Feel free to call me if you have any questions.”

“Don’t worry, go ahead,” I said, sitting down on Fangyuan’s office chair.

Fangyuan quickly packed his things, and Yan Yan linked her arm with his. As they were about to leave, she suddenly remembered something and said to me, “Zhaoyang, our company’s new property development is about to launch. If you want to buy one, I can help you get an employee discount. It’ll save you 1,500 yuan per square meter!”

Yan Yan was the sales manager of a real estate company in this city. The employee discount she could offer was definitely attractive—saving at least 100,000 yuan on an entire apartment. However, even with that, I still couldn’t afford to buy a house.

“I’ll think about it later,” I replied.

Fangyuan asked Yan Yan, “Which development is it?”

“The second phase of Zhongyuan Eco City,” Yan Yan answered.

Fangyuan put down his briefcase, his expression turning serious as he said to me, “Zhaoyang, you should buy it. This development is really good. If you miss this opportunity, who knows when the next one will come? Plus, property prices will definitely skyrocket in the future!”

“Buy what? You know how broke I am.”

“We have a few ten thousand yuan in savings. We can lend it to you first. You can also ask your dad for help. We should be able to scrape together enough for the down payment, right?”

“You two still have to pay off your mortgage and car loan. You’re getting married soon, and there’s going to be a lot of expenses. Really, don’t worry about me.”

Yan Yan added, “We’re managing our mortgage and car loan payments just fine. Zhaoyang, you should buy a house first. It’ll be easier to find a girlfriend afterward. We really don’t want to see you living like this anymore. It’s frustrating, really frustrating!”

“You two can manage paying the mortgage and car loan together, but have you thought about how I’m going to pay off a mortgage after buying a house? I can barely support myself, let alone pay off a damn mortgage! Come on, just go already. It’s getting dark.”

Yan Yan and Fangyuan exchanged a glance, both sighed softly, looked at me once more, and then left.

…

Standing by the floor-to-ceiling window, I saw Yan Yan linking arms with Fangyuan as they walked toward their newly purchased white Mazda 6 downstairs. I felt an indescribable emotion.

Fangyuan, Yan Yan, and I were all graduates of Soochow University. They already had their own house and car in this city and were about to get married. I couldn’t understand why there was such a big gap between us. Was it a joke from fate, or had I simply ruined myself?

As I gazed out in loneliness, I couldn’t help but wonder: If I hadn’t broken up with Jian Wei, would we also be getting married by now?

…

At 9 p.m., I finally finished the project proposal Fangyuan had left behind. I stretched my body and took my cup, heading toward the staff lounge to have my last cup of coffee before leaving work.

I absentmindedly listened to the sound of the coffee pouring from the machine into the cup, as if it were a gentle call, leaving no place for my desires to hide.

I took a big sip of coffee, gazing at the thick darkness outside and the struggling neon lights, and really wished I could cast off this weary body!

…

The phone rang. I took it out from my pocket and looked at the screen—it was Le Yao again.

I answered the call. Le Yao’s weak voice said to me, “Zhaoyang, where are you?”

“Working overtime,” I replied, my tone ambiguous.

“Can you come help me do the laundry? My hands can’t touch water.”

“Are you kidding me? Don’t you have a washing machine?” I angrily asked in frustration.

“Then come and do me,” she said tiredly.

I was speechless for a moment and said, “My point is the washing machine, not doing you!”

“Some clothes can’t be washed in the washing machine.”

“Then take them to the dry cleaner. I’ve been working all day and I’m exhausted like a grandson. I don’t have the energy to do it.”

“Underwear, bras, and boxers can’t be dry cleaned, can they?”

“You must be crazy, asking me to wash your underwear and bras!”

“Zhaoyang, I just had surgery. My hands really can’t touch water. Can’t you show me a little compassion?”

“I know you graduated from the Shanghai Theatre Academy, but please don’t act with me, okay?”

Le Yao really started to cry, “I got pregnant because of you, and this is how you treat me? Have you ever considered my feelings? Do you know how much pain I’m in, how my heart is breaking?”

“Are you acting in a Qiong Yao drama with me now, asking me a series of rhetorical questions!”

Le Yao sobbed uncontrollably, “Zhaoyang… you beast… you won’t regret it if I die for you!”

Le Yao left me at a loss, “Alright, my dear lady, I’m scared of you. I’ll come, okay?”

Le Yao’s tone instantly turned calm, “Hurry up then. I’m waiting for you!”

As I heard the “beep” from the disconnected call, I suddenly thought: If Le Yao doesn’t become a famous actress, it’s definitely because the film industry has no eye for talent. Her acting skills were truly incredible!

People who study acting are truly terrifying, and women who study acting are even more terrifying!

…

After leaving the company, I stood by the roadside waiting for a taxi, suddenly remembering that I had promised Mi Cai to help her move after work. It was already almost 9:30!

“I hope she hasn’t moved my stuff out again,” I muttered.

A taxi had already stopped beside me. I thought for a moment: since I had already broken my promise, I might as well go wash Le Yao’s clothes first, and deal with the moving later.

About 15 minutes later, I arrived at Le Yao’s one-bedroom apartment. Standing at the door, I furiously pressed the doorbell to vent my frustration at being forced to come.

Le Yao opened the door wearing pajamas, hugging a stuffed animal, her face pale and tired. Her pitiful appearance made me swallow back all the harsh words I had prepared in advance, and I just complained, “You’re such a hassle!”

“If you don’t sleep with me, there wouldn’t be these problems,” Le Yao said, stepping aside to let me in.

I didn’t feel like arguing with Le Yao. I walked into the house and asked her, “Where are the clothes?”

“In the laundry basket in the bathroom.”

I went to the bathroom and was immediately startled. Two extra-large laundry baskets were filled with clothes. I angrily said, “Did you intentionally save up a year’s worth of laundry just to torture me?”

Le Yao didn’t respond. The volume of the TV in the living room got even louder.

I was so angry my liver hurt, but I still gritted my teeth and dumped all the clothes from the laundry baskets. I separated them into piles: one for the washing machine, one for hand washing, and one specifically for underwear and bras.

For the next hour, I worked alongside the washing machine, finally finishing washing all the clothes.

I carried the washed clothes to the balcony and hung them up one by one. After finishing, I stood on the balcony and lit a cigarette to relieve my fatigue.

Le Yao came over with a fruit plate and softly asked, “Do you want to eat something?”

“No appetite,” I said, taking a deep puff of my cigarette.

Le Yao took the cigarette from my fingers and pulled out a tissue from her pocket to wipe the sweat from my forehead. Her tone was gentle as she said, “Zhaoyang, a magazine said that a man who is willing to wash a woman’s underwear and bras must be a gentle and reliable man.”

“Go away. Do you think I actually want to help you wash clothes?”

Even though I scolded her, Le Yao still linked her arm with mine, leaning against my body as she asked, “Have you ever washed clothes for any other woman besides me?”

“No,” I replied impatiently.

“Not even for Jianwei?” she pressed.

“Are you trying to annoy me? What kind of stupid question is that!” I said, pushing Le Yao away.

Le Yao was already used to my attitude. She didn’t get angry or speak, just looked at me.

I put on my coat and told her, “I’m leaving. Don’t call me anymore.”

Le Yao grabbed me, “I won’t let you go.”

“Let go of me,” I raised my arm and shook off Le Yao’s tight grip.

Le Yao blocked the door again and said, “Don’t leave yet. I have something for you.” She then pulled out a bank card from her pajama pocket, seemingly prepared in advance, and handed it to me, saying, “This is for you. There’s ten thousand yuan in the card. I know you spent a lot this time.”

I was stunned, “Where did you get this money?”

“I got some money in advance from the production team.”

“Have you had a change of heart?”

Le Yao stared at me with a sorrowful expression for a long time, “The child is yours… I told you, I just want to see you take responsibility. Of course, I will repay you for the money you spent.”

The more serious Le Yao looked, the more I felt she was acting. In my eyes, she was just a woman who liked to indulge in a life of luxury. Her talk of responsibility was unreliable. I knew this well because I was the same way.

The reason she insisted the child was mine might just be a form of emptiness and emotional dependence, or maybe she herself didn’t even know who the father was… This strange kind of emotional attachment was hard to explain in words, but people living in this decadent circle understood it well… We seemed carefree, but our hearts were empty!

…

In the end, I didn’t take the card from Le Yao, even though I was in desperate need of money. As for why I refused it, I couldn’t really explain. Perhaps deep down I felt sympathy for Le Yao. I might have cursed at her with my words, but when she needed help, I would still be there for her.

No matter how glamorous she appeared, I understood the emptiness behind her. We were the same kind of people, the only difference being that one day she might become a famous actress, while I was destined to live an ordinary and lonely life!

…

After leaving Le Yao’s place, I immediately took a taxi heading toward my old residence, hoping that Mi Cai wouldn’t have thrown my belongings out because I broke our promise. I didn’t want to work overtime, nor did I want to be dragged by Le Yao to wash clothes! But life was full of so many unexpected twists that left me helpless.