Chapter 26: Will We Be Together?

The Ferris wheel behind us had stopped rotating and a new group of people boarded. After a long pause under Leyao’s gaze, I finally nodded and said, “Yes, I actually have something to talk to you about this time I came to Hengdian.”

Leyao replied with an expression of expectation, “You definitely didn’t come here just because you missed me. You wouldn’t even think about me.”

“Don’t say that. It makes me feel like I’m only reaching out because I need something from you.”

Leyao smiled and teased, “So, have you thought about me these days?”

“There you go again!”

“Okay, okay… I won’t tease you anymore. Tell me, what did you come to talk about?”

I remained silent for a moment before asking, “Are you free recently?”

“The production just started filming, and I have scenes almost every day,” Leyao replied.

“That busy?!” I exclaimed.

Leyao nodded, “Yes, the schedule is pretty tight lately. We even have two night shoots tonight, so I should head back to the set soon. I can’t stay with you for long.”

My heart sank, knowing that I might leave empty-handed. I didn’t want to pressure Leyao, so after a moment of silence, I said, “Then you go ahead. It’s not that important anyway. If you don’t have time, forget about it.”

Leyao checked her watch and said, “I really need to go.”

I smiled and said, “Go ahead.”

Before leaving, Leyao asked me again, “Where are you staying?”

“At Xiao Li’s Inn.”

“Oh, okay then. I’m off. Bye, Zhaoyang.” Leyao waved at me and then ran off.

…

The Ferris wheel kept turning, but suddenly I felt very alone. I lay on the bench, not wanting to return to the inn.

Although I had assured my boss that I would get this done, I still didn’t want to pressure Leyao. Since she really didn’t have any availability, I decided to leave it to fate.

The reason I gave up so easily was because I understood Leyao’s situation. As a newcomer on set, she had to follow others’ instructions most of the time. And under such a tight production schedule, it was indeed difficult for her to find free time. After all, the entire crew couldn’t stop filming just to accommodate her.

Actually, I should be happy for Leyao. Not having free time meant that she had a significant role in this production, and maybe this role could finally make her famous.

Back at the inn, I took a hot shower to relieve some of my fatigue before lying down on the bed. I couldn’t help but worry about my and Fangyuan’s professional future. I could only hope that Chen Jingming was making a mountain out of a molehill and that Gucci wouldn’t necessarily terminate the collaboration over this matter.

I couldn’t fall asleep for a long time, and as my mind anxiously wandered, the time had already reached the early hours of the morning. The world gradually quieted down, sinking into stillness.

I walked to the window, opened it, lit a cigarette, and gazed at the gray outside, once again emptying my mind of all thoughts.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. At first, I thought it was for the neighboring room, but upon listening carefully, I realized it was for my room.

I felt puzzled. After all, this kind of residential inn shouldn’t offer any special services. Who could it be at this hour?

I looked through the peephole and saw Leyao standing outside.

I opened the door, and Leyao smiled at me, saying, “Well, surprised, right?”

“Just surprised, no joy!” I was genuinely shocked by Leyao’s unexpected visit. I never expected her to come find me at this hour.

Leyao entered the room, placed her cosmetics and toiletries in the bathroom, and then told me, “I came to find you right after finishing filming today. I’m staying here with you tonight.”

“You really need it, huh?” I asked from the bathroom doorway.

“Need it, yes! But not tonight. I can’t have sex for a month after an abortion. You should know that basic physiology, right, Zhaoyang!” Leyao said while removing her makeup.

“You never change, always scheming. You come here so boldly, did you ever think how hard this night will be for me?”

“Just find a way to deal with it yourself!” Leyao said casually.

I didn’t say anything else.

…

I lay in bed watching TV while Leyao, after finishing her hygiene routine, slipped into the bed wearing pajamas and snuggled into my arms, saying, “Stop watching TV.”

“What else am I supposed to do if I can’t have sex with you?” I continued staring at the TV.

Leyao grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. The room instantly became quiet. She spoke to me unusually seriously, “Tell me, why did you come find me this time?”

“I already said it’s not a big deal!” I said as I reached for the remote again.

“You’re not stupid. If it was just to spend a night with me, would it be worth the trip from Suzhou to Hengdian?” Leyao said, taking the remote from my hand again.

“I didn’t come here to sleep with you either, right?”

“Then stop hesitating and tell me why you came.”

Under Leyao’s persistent questioning, I finally said, “Recently, Gucci has been negotiating with our department store to set up a specialty counter. A female representative from Gucci saw the promotional poster you shot for our mall and thought your image fits well with Gucci’s product positioning. She hopes you can shoot a set of promotional photos for Gucci to support the opening campaign…” I added after a pause, “But if you can’t find time in your schedule, it’s okay.”

“So your company must be taking the collaboration with Gucci pretty seriously?”

“We currently have seven international first-tier brands in our department store. Adding Gucci makes it eight, which meets the B-level standard for top-tier department stores. So yes, we do value it highly,” I replied.

“See, if I hadn’t asked, you wouldn’t have told me about such a big deal?” Leyao’s tone carried a hint of complaint.

“If you really don’t have time, telling you won’t help anyway. You should focus on your work first. Please don’t feel pressured.”

After a moment of silence, Leyao asked me, “How many days would the shoot take approximately?”

“Probably two days, maybe even one. It’s not certain yet how Gucci plans to shoot.”

Leyao nodded and said, “That’s okay. Actually, before coming here, I already talked to the director and asked for leave. He said he could give me two days off. You can coordinate with Gucci to find out when they plan to shoot.”

A stone suddenly lifted from my heart, but I reminded Leyao again, “Don’t force yourself, okay?”

“For you, forcing myself a bit is nothing.”

…

The night was pitch black, with only a dim nightlight left on in the room. Leyao was still curled up in my arms, and it seemed neither of us felt sleepy.

“Zhaoyang, do you think we could ever be together?”

I didn’t know why Leyao suddenly asked this. I hesitated for a long time before answering, “We’re from different worlds. Your future is bright, while I’ve always been just getting by. The reason we’re sleeping together now is more about loneliness and physical needs.”

“Maybe… Since I chose this path, I no longer expect love.”

Suddenly hearing the word “love” felt so hollow and unfamiliar that I momentarily forgot I was still talking to Leyao.

We fell silent, both experiencing the helplessness of being alive. Even though we were sleeping together at this moment, we wouldn’t truly live together, because our paths were different. One day, we would part ways and no longer see each other.

“Leyao, let’s not keep seeing each other like this. Otherwise, it will become a burden for us in the future…” I finally said after a long pause.

Leyao hugged me tighter, remained silent for a while, and finally said calmly, “Okay, after tonight, let’s just be friends.”

That night, Leyao and I slept in the same bed. She held me tightly and slept peacefully. I knew she didn’t need just a casual partner or a boyfriend, but rather someone to rely on, to keep her from sinking in this heavy reality.

As for me… Perhaps I needed a woman with whom I could live a normal life, someone who would take my heart and comfort it. But where was she?

I remember: I once searched for her on the other shore, but she wasn’t there. I searched where the lights were dim, but she wasn’t there either…