That night, I talked with Li Xiaoyun for a long time. The atmosphere between us was much more natural than when we first met. We even shared stories about our past relationships during college, which made us both feel nostalgic and a little sad.
Li Xiaoyun graduated from the Mining University in our hometown, Xuzhou. Her college boyfriend, however, was from Xiamen. Although they deeply loved each other, they eventually broke up due to geographical distance.
When I talked about my past with Jian Wei, I felt even more helpless than Li Xiaoyun did. I had once pursued love fearlessly, even moving to Shanghai with Jian Wei and willing to stay there for work and life. Yet, in the end, we still couldn’t escape a breakup, and I was devastated for a long time. Gradually, I came to understand that the beauty of love only lasts a moment, and very few people truly have the ability to preserve that beauty.
As Li Xiaoyun and I shared these reflections, it was already 10 p.m., time for us to part ways.
Standing outside the Japanese restaurant, I took out 1,000 yuan from my wallet and handed it to Li Xiaoyun, slightly apologetically saying, “I feel really embarrassed. Our first blind date and I had to borrow money from you.”
Li Xiaoyun smiled and took the money from me, saying, “It all depends on how you see it. At the time, I did think you were quite unusual, but now I realize it was just your casual and masculine nature.”
Jokingly, I said, “So borrowing money actually showed off my masculine charm. Then next time, I’ll borrow even more from you.”
“That won’t do. Too many times and it will prove there’s a problem with your abilities. A man can be down on his luck for a while, but he shouldn’t stay that way forever, right?” Li Xiaoyun said seriously.
I nodded earnestly, understanding her meaning. If I could really join her company, it was time for me to prove my work capability.
…
When I returned home, my father and mother were still up. They had recently been watching a family drama series and had developed a habit of going to bed later than usual.
Seeing me come back, my mother asked with concern, “Zhaoyang, did you have a date with Xiaoyun today?”
“Mm,” I replied.
“Did you pay back the money you borrowed from her last time?”
“I did. Oh, and she’s even going to help me find a job. So you don’t have to worry about my employment anymore,” I said. I told my mother this because I didn’t want her to pressure my father about my job.
“Is it the advertising company where she works?”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
My mother sighed and said, “Xiaoyun is really a good girl. Have you thought about trying to develop a relationship with her?”
I replied helplessly, “Mom, you know what level I’m at. Would she even look twice at me?”
“You silly boy, if she didn’t have a good impression of you, would she lend you money, go out with you, and even help you find a job? Although Xiaoyun’s family isn’t wealthy, her parents both have stable jobs. Your father also has a secure job. We know each other’s backgrounds well, and it’s a good match. I think it’s great for you two to be together. The key is for you to work hard and settle down in your job, understand?”
I agreed, “Mom, you’re right!”
Nodding, my mother pressed further, “Quickly tell your mom—do you like Xiaoyun? Do you want to try being a couple with her?”
“Of course I do. How could I not? Xiaoyun is great. She’s a girl who can build a life together with someone.”
My mother’s face lit up with joy as she said, “Great, then. It’ll be even more convenient for you two to work at the same company. You must seize this opportunity, understand?”
“Just relax, Mom. I also want to get married soon and work hard to give you two grandparents a grandchild.”
My description of the future made my mother beam with joy. My father, who had been silent, suddenly asked, “Zhaoyang, did that girl from Suzhou go back today?”
“Yeah, she left this morning.”
My father nodded and after a while said, “She was a good girl too.”
I looked at my father, puzzled, but he didn’t say anything else. The TV was showing an advertisement, and he picked up the remote to switch channels, appearing nonchalant. I felt like I might be overthinking it. Perhaps my father was just making a casual remark. In some ways, Mi Cai really was a nice girl, but I always felt her world was too unreal, and the distance between us was too great.
…
Back in my room, I lit a cigarette as usual, instinctively contemplating life, love, and my recent experiences.
At this moment, I truly believed I had moved on from Jian Wei. Subtly, I had already entered a new phase of life. I longed for a stable, simple love, and eventually, when the time was right, I wanted to turn that love into marriage. My blind date, Li Xiaoyun, seemed like the most suitable candidate for this.
I thought this kind of life was good—happy together as a family. I wouldn’t have to wander anymore or go to bars to drown my loneliness in alcohol-induced dizziness.
Perhaps choosing to return to Xuzhou was the wisest decision I had made in my life. It was a gift from heaven, allowing me, a man who was meant to be successful, to return to the right path and realize my value within a complete family.
Suddenly, I thought of Mi Cai again, and a faint pain stirred in my heart. This pain made me realize I still cared for her, but I preferred to interpret this care as sympathy—for her background and her current difficult situation.
I remembered to send her a message, checking if she had returned safely to Suzhou.
It took a while for Mi Cai to reply. Her message was simple, just two words: “Arrived.”
I immediately replied, “You drove for so long today. Rest early, don’t get too tired!”
I waited for a long time, but Mi Cai didn’t respond. Eventually, I fell asleep while waiting…
That night, I had a dream. In the dream, I saw that city hidden in the sky again. The city was still crystal clear, and I also saw the woman with long hair reaching her shoulders, but she was only a silhouette. I desperately tried to get closer to see who she was, but no matter how hard I ran, I couldn’t reach her.
I shouted, “Who are you really?”
“You are a woman in my heart.”
“If she’s in my heart, why can’t I get close to her?”
“Because you don’t yet understand what your heart truly desires.”
I repeated her words, but before I could grasp their meaning, I suddenly woke up. Looking out the window, I saw the sky was already lightening. I realized it had just been a dream, yet I felt a sense of joy. This joy was faint, almost non-existent, and quickly transformed into disappointment. Was it really true that I didn’t understand what my heart truly desired?
I sat there thinking for a long time when suddenly my phone rang. I picked it up and saw it was a call from Li Xiaoyun.
I quickly answered and greeted her, “Good morning, Xiaoyun.”
“Good morning, Zhaoyang.”
“Is there something important this early?”
“Don’t you remember we agreed last night that you’d send me your resume?”
Apologetically, I said, “Look at my memory. I’ll get up right away and send it to your email.”
“Do you even remember the email address? I doubt you can remember it.”
I said awkwardly, “Don’t think of me as that unreliable. It’s saved on my phone!”
Finally, Li Xiaoyun smiled and said, “Then hurry up and send it. Today I’ll give it to Zhou, the director of the planning department. Let’s try to get your job settled as soon as possible.”
“Thank you so much for all your effort!” I sincerely expressed my gratitude.
“I’m just worried you might have no income and end up borrowing money from the girl again on our next blind date.” Li Xiaoyun laughed heartily after saying that.
I was speechless for a long time before exclaiming, “You sure know how to cut deep with words!”
“That depends on who I’m talking to. If I don’t maintain a bit of assertiveness, I might end up being taken advantage of in our future interactions. From what Auntie Zhang said, you weren’t just an ordinary mischievous kid. Bullying girls was practically routine for you when you were little!” Li Xiaoyun said with a nostalgic tone.
I laughed and said, “I’m really good to my girlfriend.”
Li Xiaoyun paused, as if realizing the implication in my words. After a while, she changed the subject, saying, “It’s getting late. I need to wash up, have breakfast, and then go to work.”
“Okay then, you go ahead and get busy.”
“Alright, remember to send me your resume.”
I acknowledged, and then Li Xiaoyun hung up. Listening to the “beep” tone on the phone, I smiled, thinking that Li Xiaoyun was truly a great girl. Suddenly, I felt a strong urge to get married and have children, right in this city that raised me.
Tai Sui Yellow Amulet Paper FuLu Taoist Love Talisman Traditional Chinese Spiritual Charm Attracting Love Protecting Marriage