Mi Cai scolded me with concern, saying I was silly. This care seemed to have already driven away the cold I had endured over the past hour. I smiled and said to Mi Cai, “You’re silly too, coming out in your pajamas. Usually, big silly girls like wearing thick pajamas when they go shopping or buy vegetables!”
Mi Cai looked at herself and pointed at the patterns on her clothes, asking me, “Don’t you think this outfit is fun? There are little bears and small cats on it.”
“It really is quite interesting!” I agreed.
Mi Cai smiled and said, “When I saw your message on my phone, I came out immediately. If you had stayed there like a fool, I would have felt guilty for letting you freeze.”
“In fact, it proves that I am somewhat foolish, but…”
“But what?”
“You came out so urgently not just because of the guilt you mentioned, but because you were worried about me.”
Mi Cai looked at me silently for a while before saying, “Okay, I admit I was worried about you. So, to stop me from worrying further, can’t you just go back now? Go home, drink some ginger soup, rest quickly, and don’t catch a chill!”
“You’re not fair!”
Mi Cai looked puzzled: “How so?”
“Following the principle of ‘everyone for me, and I for everyone,’ shouldn’t you be the one to cook the ginger soup for me? I’ve cooked it for you several times.”
“But you often make me half-dead with anger. By this logic, shouldn’t I do the same to you?”
I smiled but didn’t continue the conversation with Mi Cai. In my heart, however, I hoped she would often make me half-dead with anger too, because at least it proved that we still had connections in our lives. I truly didn’t want a day to come when we became strangers or left each other’s worlds.
…
That night, Mi Cai ultimately chose to abandon retaliation in favor of mutual care. She accompanied me back to that old house, and indeed, I had caught a chill, continuously sneezing while lying in bed.
A while later, Mi Cai brought me a bowl of ginger soup she had prepared and sat by the bed watching me, but I wasn’t very confident about this bowl of ginger soup.
“Drink it. I followed exactly the method you described, and I even added extra brown sugar.”
“Oh, just make sure there’s no poison in it.”
Mi Cai ignored my loose tongue but looked at the photo frame on the TV cabinet. The frame contained a photo we had recently taken from her desk drawer.
“Zhaoyang, can you put these photos away?”
I sneezed loudly and shook my head, saying, “No way. You didn’t know that the old man personally installed that frame, right?”
“Ah!…”
“He said that photos tucked inside books would fade, so he put them in a frame.”
“Oh, but…”
I interrupted, “You’re afraid those pouting, cute, and peace-sign photos of yours will disgust others, right?… Actually, you’re overthinking. Besides you and me, practically no one ever comes to this room.”
“Fine, do whatever you want. It’s your problem if you want to keep them; it doesn’t bother me.” Mi Cai’s tone was somewhat displeased.
I poured oil on the fire: “I’ve seen them every day, so they don’t disgust me anymore. They even keep evil spirits away and help me sleep soundly at night, ha ha…”
Mi Cai looked at me expressionlessly, but her gaze unsettled me. Usually, the calmer she appeared, the more she was likely planning ways to torment me. But there was nothing I could do about it—I was just a bit of a troublemaker who loved to tease her.
In fact, Mi Cai didn’t really hold a grudge against me. She just urged me, “Zhaoyang, drink the ginger soup all at once now.”
“If I drink it all at once, won’t I burn my mouth?”
Mi Cai questioned, “Are you really sick? If you won’t drink the ginger soup, how come you still have the energy to laugh like a ghost?”
Immediately, I took a tissue from the bedside cabinet, blew my nose, and then held it up to Mi Cai, saying, “Look, this big snot won’t lie. I really have a cold!”
Mi Cai didn’t say anything but leaned back slightly, keeping her distance from the tissue with the big snot on it.
Feeling somewhat awkward, I threw the tissue into the trash bin and complained, “If I disgust you so much, could you at least react a little?”
Mi Cai still looked calm as she said to me, “The more I pay attention to you, the more you enjoy acting this way with such low taste… Come on, drink the ginger soup quickly. I need to tidy up and go to sleep!”
Finally, I suppressed my mischievous thoughts, picked up the slightly cooled ginger soup, drank it in a few gulps, and then handed the bowl to Mi Cai. She took it and prepared to leave.
“Wait…” I called out to her departing figure.
She turned around but didn’t smile: “What’s wrong?”
I found it hard to express myself and eventually chose a more subtle way to ask, “Do you feel like we aren’t as close as we imagined? Like right now… although we’re in the same room, yet…”
Mi Cai remained silent for a while before looking at me and saying, “We aren’t as distant as you imagined either.”
I looked at her. Perhaps she was right; we weren’t really far apart, but it was like a colorful leaf falling on a humble heart. Still, I gathered my courage and said, “Come back to Xuzhou with me for the Lunar New Year. It’s really lively there during the Spring Festival.”
“You told me that last time.”
“You said you were going to the U.S. for the Spring Festival…”
“Yes, but now I’m back.”
“So, you have nowhere else to go, only to go with me to Xuzhou…”
“Yeah, yeah… I have nowhere else to go. Will you take me in?” I was overjoyed, and she smiled, leaving amidst my happiness. I forgot to say goodnight to her.
That was okay because I never liked saying goodnight when I was happy, as it would interrupt my joy.
That night, I had a dream. In my dream, a colorful butterfly landed in the palm of my hand, so pleasing to the eye. I gazed at her greedily, yet without worry, because the struggle of capture wouldn’t rub off her beautiful colors. She stayed on my palm for a long time before flapping her wings. I followed her with my eyes, suddenly seeing a crystal-clear city gradually merging with the colorful butterfly.
In my dream, I suddenly understood: perhaps that colorful butterfly was the long-haired woman.
…
The next day, when I woke up, it was almost noon. Habitually, I turned on my phone to check the time and found a message from Leyao. She asked me to call her after getting up.
I immediately called her, and she answered quickly. I asked, “What’s up?”
“Invite Mi Cai for lunch today. I’ll treat her, and explain yesterday’s incident to her on your behalf.”
I smiled and said, “No need to explain anymore. Everything is fine between us now.”
“Did you manage to appease her?”
“Not exactly appeasement, but everything is fine now.”
“How did you manage that?”
Just as I was about to answer, Leyao continued, “I shouldn’t have asked. If she truly cares about you, she will definitely forgive this misunderstanding that was baseless to begin with.”
I remained silent, finding her words reasonable. At that moment, I absolutely believed Mi Cai cared about me. Yet why hadn’t I confessed last night?
I still couldn’t quite get over that hurdle. Because a colorful leaf had fallen on a humble heart. The leaf had temporarily found a place to rest, but the humble heart feared it couldn’t keep that colorful leaf, since the leaf’s departure only required a passing breeze. Unless I had the ability to build four walls to block out that damned wind, but was I capable enough now?
…
After ending the call with Leyao, I lit a cigarette and sat on the bed smoking without even washing up. Halfway through the cigarette, I suddenly thought of Leyao again. What would happen to her if I took Mi Cai back to Xuzhou?
She had specially come back from Beijing to accompany me. I couldn’t possibly leave her alone in Suzhou, but I also couldn’t take her along with Mi Cai back to Xuzhou because that would be highly inappropriate!
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