After CC left, I could never fully devote myself to work. I kept glancing out the window, hoping to catch sight of her back or smell the faint scent of laundry detergent she used to leave behind. However, none of these happened. As night fell, sadness gradually filled my office, drowning me.
I lit a cigarette and opened all the glass windows. The view suddenly became vast and open, and my sadness stretched even longer. Eventually, it formed a bridge connecting the neon lights of the city, casting the entire night world into a flickering glow.
Feeling utterly lonely, I finally sent a message to Luo Ben, suggesting we meet for a few drinks. Actually, I wanted to know what had happened last night in the hospital room among the three of them and why CC had left so suddenly and permanently.
Luo Ben’s reply was just one word: “Hmm.” He must have been deeply saddened as well. After all, nobody likes such a farewell, especially those of us who had been close friends with CC, sharing every moment with her. Her departure was too abrupt and resolute. So resolute that my mind was filled with her shadow in daily life, while her body had already completely left my world, leaving me only these empty images to fill my memories of her, making me feel emptier with every attempt.
I shut down my computer, which had kept me company throughout the day, when my phone coincidentally rang inside my briefcase. Without bothering to put out the cigarette butt, I hurriedly took the phone out—it was Mi Cai calling. At her end, it was already four in the morning, so the call surprised me.
I answered the call, slightly worried, asking, “Why did you call me at this hour?”
“I just finished writing a report. Before going to sleep, I thought I’d call you… How was your day?”
I didn’t even have time to feel sorry for Mi Cai staying up late before my mood instantly sank again. After a long pause, I asked in a low voice, “Did CC contact you today?”
Feeling my mood, Mi Cai asked with concern, “No. What’s wrong with her?”
Mi Cai’s answer was within my expectations, further indicating CC’s firm resolve to leave. Therefore, she hadn’t contacted even Mi Cai. Her heart, filled with the past people and events, had died in this city. Meanwhile, another heart, not yet connected with the outside world, was quietly growing inside her body, yet it seemed separated from us by time and space.
Finally, I told Mi Cai, “She said goodbye to me this afternoon… We won’t have any more chances to see her again. She’s tired of everything in this city and wants to find a strange place to start a new life, no longer willing to be disturbed by us old friends.”
I couldn’t see Mi Cai’s expression on the other end of the phone, but her prolonged silence already showed her current feelings. Eventually, her voice choked up as she asked, “Does she really not care anymore?… There must be a chance for us to find her, right?”
“A person who truly wants to leave won’t let you find her. After she left, I tried calling her again, but her number had already been canceled!”
“Why did she leave so decisively?”
I hesitated for a long time before telling her, “It was Luo Ben who left the ten thousand yuan at the restaurant back then… Actually, Luo Ben has feelings for CC, but such feelings are unspeakable and cannot be put into action… It’s just too complicated between them!”
“…Zhaoyang, are you saying: can a man truly love two women at the same time?”
In Mi Cai’s question, I once again sensed her fragile sensitivity and quickly replied, “Don’t extend this question too far. Luo Ben is just a special case. You know how CC has felt about him all these years; how could he not be moved? Besides, CC is such a charming woman! And Professor Wei is someone he cannot afford to disappoint… That’s why he faced such a complicated choice!”
“I’m just asking out of curiosity; I didn’t extend it to you. Why are you so nervous?”
“I’m just afraid you might overthink. You know there can’t be any impurities between us. If we clearly and honestly explain things now, there won’t be any hidden problems in the future.”
Perhaps still immersed in the sadness of CC’s departure, Mi Cai didn’t dwell on the matter further and fell silent…
I continued to reflect on myself, “It was me who didn’t listen to your advice back then. I insisted on uncovering the truth, otherwise CC wouldn’t have made this painful decision for herself and for us.”
Mi Cai finally spoke up, “Maybe this time you were right… When life and emotions break a woman’s heart completely, leaving forever might be the best choice!”
For some unknown reason, my heart trembled strangely when Mi Cai said this, followed by a feeling of chest tightness. I didn’t know how to continue our conversation, but her words had already been deeply engraved in my heart.
Not minding my silence, Mi Cai said, “It’s getting late on my side. I’ll go to sleep first…”
My emotions surged again, and I immediately interrupted, saying, “Wait… Don’t hang up yet.”
“Anything else?”
After hesitating, I said, “No matter what happens in the future, I won’t let you get hurt in life or emotions. Believe me, okay?”
Mi Cai laughed slightly, “You don’t need to feel so anxious. I believe you. I also think that our future life won’t have so many entanglements and troubles that can’t be sorted out… Isn’t living simply always what we pursued?”
“Yeah…”
…
After ending the call with Mi Cai, I smoked a cigarette in the office, finally calming down. Then I drove to the restaurant called “Kong Cheng Li” (Empty City). When I arrived, Luo Ben was already sitting on the sofa near the corner, drinking beer, his face full of pain from trying to drown his sorrows in alcohol.
I sat down beside him and ordered a beer as well. After taking a sip, I asked him, “Did CC come to find you this afternoon?”
Luo Ben simply shook his head, then continued drinking his beer.
I took the bottle from his hand. He looked at me expressionlessly. I leaned back against the sofa, closed my eyes, and said to him, “CC has left. She said it was a farewell forever, that she would never come back. From now on, there will be no woman named CC in your life or mine… Haha, calling her CC all these years, sometimes I can’t even recall her real name, Ye Beini. Maybe in that completely unfamiliar place, no one will call her CC anymore.”
A sobbing sound came from beside me. I opened my eyes and saw Luo Ben curled up in the corner of the sofa, like a soft-bodied cold-blooded creature floating on water, yet shedding hot tears… At that moment, no one could truly share his grief, not even me… But I knew, he had forever lost the yesterday with CC. From now on, there would never be another woman who would willingly get hurt by him, participate in his talent show, be his guest singer, and care about every detail of his life… CC had only been gone half a day, but she had truly walked far away!
After a long, long while, I gently patted his shoulder and asked, “Can you tell me what exactly happened last night in the hospital room among the three of you? What made CC make this decision?”
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