I sang two songs on this plaza, and then dusk quickly gave way to night. The city lights began to crisscross again, weaving a brilliance unique to this place, as if trying to cover up the heart-wrenching pain and all the helplessness and confusion that had occurred here.
I felt a bit tired, so I stopped singing and put the guitar aside. The group of children seemed to be rescued, hugging each other and leaving joyfully. They were still young, their lives just beginning. How could they be interested in a song like “Past Glories,” which sings of life’s helplessness? They were only interested in that roaring gasoline-powered racing car.
When I was finally alone, I took out a cigarette from my pocket and lit it while facing the city’s dizzying rotation. I closed my eyes and let the smoke disperse in my mouth. I heard sounds coming from all directions—like drumbeats, like cries drowned in fate…
I thought of Roben again, and of the days we used to make music together. Since he went to America, I’ve called him three times. Two of those times, his phone was turned off. The only time I reached him, he was sleeping. He spoke only a few words before impatiently hanging up. At the time, it was the afternoon in the U.S., not even a holiday. He was sleeping with such irritation—no idea what kind of life he was living over there… Probably drinking himself to death again!
And CC—where was she now? Did she still regard music as an indispensable part of her life? Did she ever miss the things that had happened in Suzhou?
I opened my mouth, and the smoke I had been holding in dispersed freely. In the time it took me to smoke one cigarette, I thought about many people and many things. I knew all of these were feelings of someone about to leave.
My phone vibrated in my pocket. I took it out and saw it was a call from Mi Cai. A wave of joy surged in my heart, mixed with a touch of loneliness. I knew this call meant I would see her tomorrow. If we worked efficiently, the day after tomorrow we would already be standing in front of Bada and Mama, giving them a big surprise.
I answered the call. A cold wind blew and made me cough. She asked with concern, “Why are you coughing so badly?”
“The smoke got into me when the wind blew.”
“Smoke less!”
“Okay… Are you coming back tomorrow?”
Mi Cai was silent for a long time before replying, “I’ll go back… The day after tomorrow is Mi Lan’s and Fang Yuan’s wedding. Did you know that?”
Upon hearing this from Mi Cai, I was stunned. It was a shocking piece of news that overwhelmed me. In this news, I saw Fang Yuan’s determination and cruelty. His wedding announcement would once again crush Yan Yan, giving her no chance to breathe. After nearly ten years of relationship, even if the end left Yan Yan humiliated, some memories belong to life itself—they need time to forget and move on.
Finally, I responded, “I knew they would get married, but I didn’t know it would be the day after tomorrow!”
“She contacted me this morning.”
I angrily said, “How dare she still contact you?”
“Zhao Yang, aren’t people always contradictory? Let’s put aside the grudges from Zhuo Mei. After all, we grew up together as sisters. I don’t want to hate her. Perhaps she still considers me her elder sister in her heart.”
I fell silent because I couldn’t understand the relationship between her and Mi Lan. I didn’t want to interfere either, so I simply asked, “Did she invite you to the wedding?”
“Yes.”
“Then will you go?”
“I want to go… but it’s not appropriate. Besides, you wouldn’t go with me anyway!”
I fell silent again before saying, “We don’t even need to consider this… At least I can’t bring myself to give my blessings to this disgusting couple, you know? They’re getting married, but the innocent child is the one paying the price behind them… Yan Yan has already had the baby aborted. Mi Lan didn’t tell you that, did she?”
Mi Cai sighed and said nothing more…
In a gloomy mood, I lit another cigarette. Amid the intertwining of smoke and lights, I felt even more confused about fate. Mi Lan was marrying Fang Yuan. If Mi Cai later married me, we would become family, but it would be a huge irony—an unspeakable irony.
I didn’t want to stay so gloomy, so I changed the topic: “By the way, did you donate that 1 million to the local medical institutions?”
“Yeah.”
I smiled and said, “There’s no one better in the world than you. You not only helped build roads for the small mountain village, but also improved their medical conditions. You’re like an angel in my heart!”
“But the road was built by Leyao. Don’t try to turn me into an angel by taking all the credit. I’d feel unworthy of that!”
“But it was still the angel who brought that money there!”
“Okay… You don’t have to deliberately find excuses or topics. I understand your intention… I won’t talk about Mi Lan with you anymore. Or maybe we can talk about when we should go back to Xuzhou?”
“I hope it’s the day after tomorrow. If that feels too rushed for you, the day after that is fine too. Anyway, I’ve already packed everything I need to take with me. I’m ready to leave anytime.”
“Then let’s make it the day after tomorrow.”
…
With my guitar on my back, I walked home. Among the passing crowd, I once again took out my phone from my pocket, preparing to call the village chief of the small mountain village to thank him for taking care of Mi Cai these days. Of course, I also needed to trouble him to safely send Mi Cai to the county town tomorrow.
Soon, the village chief answered the call. Before I could even speak, he said gratefully, “Brother Zhaoyang, you are truly a benefactor to our village! Since our parents’ generation, we’ve been longing for this road. Now it has finally come true. Thank you so much…”
I didn’t dare to take credit and smiled as I replied, “Village Chief, you don’t need to be so polite. What Mi Cai and I did for this road was just a small favor. The person you should truly thank is Leyao…”
The village chief sighed, “She’s a big celebrity, and we can’t even contact her. At first, we thought she was just joking with us. We never expected she actually cared about this matter… Brother Zhaoyang, next time you see her, please be sure to convey our thanks to her and invite her to visit our village again… We’ll treat her with the best food and drinks!”
“Don’t worry, Village Chief. I’ll definitely pass on your words to her.”
Even though I made this assurance, the village chief still seemed uneasy and reminded me repeatedly. I patiently listened until he finally believed I wouldn’t forget. Then I said to him, “Village Chief, Mi Cai is returning to Suzhou tomorrow. Please personally send her to the county town. Otherwise, I won’t feel at ease.”
“No problem, no problem… I’ll send her off early tomorrow morning.”
“Thank you, Village Chief. These days she must have caused you quite a bit of trouble there, right?”
“Brother Zhaoyang, you shouldn’t say that… We’re still grateful to her and haven’t even properly thanked her yet! When we heard she brought the money for building the road, everyone was so happy!!”
I felt puzzled. Why did the village chief keep emphasizing the road construction but never mention the 1 million yuan donated by Mi Cai for improving the local medical conditions? Compared to building a road, wasn’t that also a significant matter? Didn’t it deserve gratitude? Or perhaps something had happened that I didn’t know about?
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