Suzhou is a city that never sleeps. Every beam of light circling around me seems to whisper the joys and sorrows I once experienced here, making me realize that the blood of this city already flows in my veins. My soul has decayed in the soil of this city because of certain people and events, yet it is also sprouting there…
That night, I didn’t know how long I had sat on this unfamiliar yet familiar street. I wanted to go to the hospital to accompany Jian Wei, who was still in a coma, but it would be of no help. I wanted to return to the old house, even if it was just to see Mi Cai for a moment, but I no longer had the courage I once had upon our first meeting. Thus, I was left alone wandering the streets, enduring the long night…
The mall across the street had already closed, and finally I stood up from the bench. I wanted to return to the old house—not necessarily to speak with Mi Cai—but simply to stand outside and confirm that she had returned home safely, which would bring me some peace.
I hailed a taxi and returned to the familiar neighborhood twenty minutes later. Standing downstairs, I looked up and saw that the lights in the apartment were off. Perhaps Mi Cai had already fallen asleep, or maybe she had taken off the mask of strength she wore during the day and was now lying in bed, silently shedding tears.
In fact, I really couldn’t claim to know her all that well, so I had always lived in guesses about her, sometimes feeling exhausted, sometimes anxious. Even though she had done her best to comfort my insecure heart, I was still terrified of losing this extraordinary woman.
I lit another cigarette downstairs, my heart filled with the impulse to go up and find her. But as soon as I took the first step up the stairs, I couldn’t bring myself to move further. I remembered her cold, indifferent expression under dim lighting. That coldness reminded me that she needed space to be alone now. After repeated attempts, she had grown weary of my emotional approach to her rationality. In this critical period, she would no longer rekindle the intense passion she once had for me.
I took out my phone and sent her a text message: “Remember to cover yourself with the quilt.”
She replied: “Okay, don’t catch a chill yourself. Find a hotel to rest.”
I lowered my head and walked out of the corridor, stopping at the place where I had stood before. I looked up at her room again, then drifted into a daze. I would rather she hadn’t replied at all, because at least that would show she was still angry with me. For a man, what we fear is not a woman’s anger, but her extreme rationality, which often strongly signals the end of love. She could care for me like an ordinary friend, but she would no longer ignite passion for me. I admit that my repeated mistakes have hurt her too much, so I dare not ask for anything else… except that promise still echoes clearly in my heart: “As long as one of us doesn’t give up, the other isn’t allowed to give up either.” But I don’t dare to use this promise as a lifeline to keep her here because I don’t want her to suffer and struggle for me again… I’m not a good man. I’ve betrayed her deep affection!
I walked away in gloom…
…
Back at the hospital, the bustling scene of the day was gone. I only saw people burdened by illness either sleeping or deeply worrying about themselves, sighing and troubled in the dead of night. I walked quietly to the end of the corridor and saw Leyao already asleep on the bench, with a bottle of Jiaxing wine and some snacks like peanuts beside her… She was so stubborn, and no matter how much I tried to persuade her, she wouldn’t leave, probably because she was sure I would come back.
I wanted to wake her, but she had already woken up reflexively, taking off her mask. Still half-asleep, she asked with concern: “Did you go to see Mi Cai? What did she say?”
“I stood downstairs for a while, but since the room was dark, I didn’t go up… Why are you still here? Didn’t I tell you to find a hotel and rest?”
“I was worried because your phone wasn’t answering… Now that I see you’re okay, I’m relieved. Here, this is the Jiaxing wine you wanted.” Leyao handed me the bottle, and I took it from her. She then tidied up her wrinkled coat.
I went to the glass window and looked into the ward at Jian Wei. She had once been radiant, bold, emotional, and brave, but she had never been this quiet before—so quiet that she seemed not to belong to this world. I didn’t know where her consciousness was wandering now, or whether that place was better than this greasy human world… Thinking of this, my heart ached again, because I didn’t want to see her body sleeping while her soul was somewhere unknown.
I sat back down on the bench, pressing my forehead with both hands, staring at the floor tiles beneath me, my heart full of thoughts. I must get justice for Jian Wei. She couldn’t suffer this calamity in vain. I had to find the person who was fanning the flames from the shadows, but I was afraid that person might be the expected one—Yan Zhuomei. If it really was her, where would my relationship with Mi Cai go? And would there be even harsher retaliation in the future?
If it wasn’t her, then who else could be targeting Jian Wei like this? Could it be someone who had a grudge with her parents before their downfall?
I furrowed my brow. Perhaps this possibility was the greatest. Other than that, I couldn’t think of anyone else who could have such cruel motives. This was almost an act of total annihilation, devoid of humanity!
While I was deep in thought, Leyao, who had never left my side, patted my shoulder softly and said in a gentle voice: “Zhaoyang, there are nurses on duty here. Don’t keep staying pointlessly like this. Go find a proper place to eat something first, then decide whether to go back to Mi Cai’s place to rest or find a hotel. It’s up to you…”
I looked up at her, a complex feeling rising in my heart. It felt as if, after so many years, the only one left by my side who still treated sharing hardships as something meaningful was her. Even though she had already married and become a renowned film star, our friendship remained unchanged, just like in the past, never spoiled… In this life, we had never been lovers for even a single day, yet our friendship could last forever between us.
…
The next morning, I came back to the hospital again. I asked the nurse on duty, and she told me that Jian Wei’s condition had remained stable, but there was still no sign of her waking up. As for when she could be transferred from the ICU to a regular ward, it would require further observation before a decision could be made.
After me, Yan Yan arrived at the hospital with a tired expression. We had already spoken on the phone the previous night, and I had learned from her about the progress of the investigation. According to the findings, this seemed more and more like a premeditated act of violence. The surveillance cameras at the stairwell where the final confrontation took place had been conveniently disabled, leaving no video evidence. The group of suspects detained by the police were all shifting blame, and the person who had actually pushed Jian Wei down the stairs had already fled. No one knew which company this person belonged to; he had simply taken advantage of the chaos to commit the crime. The police currently had no clues at all. This clean and efficient method of operation further confirmed that it was a well-planned act with malicious intent.
Yan Yan and I sat dejectedly on the bench. After a long silence, I said to her, “Yan Yan, there’s something I want to discuss with you.”
“Hmm? What is it?”
“The ‘Wenyi Road’ project—before Jian Wei’s accident, she had already fully entrusted it to you, right?”
Yan Yan nodded, saying, “Yes, including all the ownership rights have been transferred to me…” She paused, tears once again streaming down her face as she continued in a choked voice, “Zhaoyang, Weiwei really intended to start anew in America. She didn’t plan to be involved in anything in China anymore, so why did she still encounter such a thing… Who could possibly want to harm her?…”
I sighed, not knowing how to answer her…
After her emotions had slightly calmed, I said to her, “Whoever intentionally harmed her will eventually be revealed. Our top priority now is to quickly stabilize her company and not let it become a mess! No one knows better than you and me how much effort she has poured into it!”
Yan Yan looked at me with a complex expression but remained silent… Perhaps in her eyes, Jian Wei had passionately invested in the company called Lukou for my dream, which I had completely failed to fulfill. Now, after such a major setback, taking over again couldn’t help but make her feel emotional.
I continued, “You continue to help manage Jian Wei’s advertising company. As for the debts owed, I will find a way to cover them. Also, for the ‘Wenyi Road’ project, I have already found a new investor with strong resources. I will also continue to be involved in the project’s future transformation and development… However, before that, I hope you can give me authorization to take full charge of the project so I can proceed with the necessary work.”
“Are you doing this for Weiwei?”
I thought for a long time before shaking my head and replying, “Not just for her… It’s also for the dream I owe her… and for my own dream.”
“I understand… I’ll prepare the authorization documents as soon as possible. I hope it’s not too late to do these things now, and that Weiwei will have the chance to see the person who should take over this project working wholeheartedly for it.”
“She definitely will see it!”
As Yan Yan and I were speaking, Qin Yan arrived with a thermos container, saying somewhat apologetically to me, “Brother Yang, you came so early too. If I had known, I would have brought an extra portion of breakfast.”
“No problem, let the ladies eat first. I can go to the hospital cafeteria later for something.”
Qin Yan opened the thermos and handed it to Yan Yan, then said to me, “Eating at the cafeteria isn’t nutritious enough. I’ll go back and make another portion later—it won’t take much time… Oh, I heard what you and Yan Yan were just talking about. You two should focus on helping Jian Wei with her company and project. Leave the task of taking care of Jian Wei and the logistics to me!”
Yan Yan rarely spoke in such a gentle tone to Qin Yan: “Thank you for your hard work.”
Qin Yan replied earnestly, “Only in times of hardship can true feelings be seen. You should learn from Brother Yang. When I was in Xuzhou, I cooked milk for him every day and made sure he had lunch and dinner, but he never said a word of thanks. Actually, there’s no need to be so formal!”
I nodded in agreement with Qin Yan’s words because only by helping others in their time of need can we expect support when we ourselves are in trouble. We should support each other in this insecure world and build the most fundamental trust.
At that moment, familiar footsteps echoed from the other end of the corridor. My heart stirred, and I turned my head to see Mi Cai walking toward us in black high heels and a white long coat. Seeing her brought me a sense of stability, but her expression no longer held the tenderness she once reserved for me when we were together. The Mi Cai I saw now was still the distant one from the past, even though she was approaching me!
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