In the deep night with everything quiet, my mind was unusually active. I kept typing various combinations of numbers and letters that might match the password into the input field, but the results were frustrating. None of the dozens of passwords I had arranged worked. My tightly wound nerves suddenly relaxed, and I gave up. I placed the tablet on the coffee table, pressed my hands against my temples, and fell into deep thought… Should I really be so obsessed with finding a clear answer for a love that no longer exists?
After thinking, I told myself: time is nothing but a gate full of turbulence, and looking back is the most foolish thing to do, as it only makes you walk through the painful path again. Choosing who to spend the rest of our lives with is our right. Since I have already chosen Mi Cai and chosen to wait, should I really treat the ups and downs of this relationship as a form of sentimentality?
I lit a cigarette, deciding that once it was finished, I would no longer trouble myself with this matter. These secrets belonged solely to Jian Wei, and I would leave them in this tablet. Whether to keep them forever or destroy them would be Jian Wei’s decision when she wakes up… I indeed have the right to choose who I want to be with, but I really have no right to touch the secrets she does not wish to share.
Half of the cigarette had burned away in my fingers. I stood on the balcony where the evening breeze most easily reached my face, opened a window, and looked out. My eyes immediately fell on the spot where Mi Cai had parked for the first time. Now, that red Audi Q7 was still in Xuzhou, but she had already left. All I could do was miss her by looking at the car. Thinking this made me feel a bit sad, so I took another deep puff of my cigarette. I realized that a night alone could indeed be unbearably hard, and I imagined Mi Cai felt the same way. Thus, imagining she also missed me brought me some comfort. I flicked the ash from the cigarette butt, turned off the balcony light, and quietly waited for sleep to come.
Passing the coffee table in the living room, I once again placed the tablet back into Jian Wei’s handbag. I hoped she would wake up and I could personally return it to her, which would be the most perfect ending between us. Or perhaps, as long as she could wake up, that itself would be a perfect ending. After all, her being alive in this world was already a great blessing for me. Unfortunately, up to now, there was still no sign of her waking, and it was even uncertain whether she retained any faint consciousness. Only after being transferred to a hospital in Shanghai would there be definite news.
This would yet again be a waiting period filled with agony!
…
The next day, the sky no longer rained. Warm sunlight gently shone onto the curtains that were not fully drawn. I got up, washed up, had a simple breakfast, and then went to the hospital. After waiting for a short while, Weiran’s cousin, the doctor named Mo Zishi, came to me and said, “Last night, I and the doctors from the Mayo Clinic conducted a comprehensive physical examination on Jian Wei. Her current physical condition meets the requirements for transfer, so she will be transferred to Shanghai this afternoon. Dr. Carter from the Mayo Clinic will be her attending physician. From now on, you can rest assured and leave her in our hands.”
“Thank you very much… I trust you. I hope you will do your best to give her another chance to open her eyes and see the world again!”
Mo Zishi smiled but asked, “Why do you trust me? You probably don’t know that I actually don’t have a good impression of you!”
“Whether you like me or not doesn’t matter to me. What matters is that you are the one Mi Cai asked to help, so I can trust you unconditionally…”
“Then aren’t you once again incurring a debt of gratitude to Xiaocai that you can’t repay? Well, maybe not even a debt of gratitude. I think this is the last favor she is doing for you, considering she had a relationship with you. This time, after returning to the U.S., she will have to accept Aunt Yan’s arrangement and stay in America with Weiran to build a family!”
A pain pierced my heart, but I didn’t get angry. I simply said, “Time will surely verify everything. We don’t need to rush to conclusions now.”
Mo Zishi shrugged and then looked at Jian Wei in the ward through the glass window. There was some sympathy on his face, for Jian Wei was still young and had once enjoyed all the love and admiration in this world, yet now she had fallen into such a condition. Anyone who knew her story would feel sorrow for her.
Jian Wei was transferred to a hospital in Shanghai at noon. Before departure, I stood in front of the ambulance and gazed at her for a long time. Only after Yan Yan repeatedly assured me that she would take good care of Jian Wei and urged me to go handle important matters did I turn to leave. Yet at the very moment the car started, I turned back to look once more… If, at any moment in the past, Jian Wei had considered Suzhou her home, I, along with everyone who cares about her, would wait for her to return… Or perhaps, whenever I have free time, I will go to Shanghai to visit her!
…
At noon, the sun shone freely into every corner of the city. I kept standing at the hospital entrance without leaving, longing in this sunlight to cleverly overcome every mistake I had made in the past and embrace the best life with the best version of myself. No matter how desperate others might say it is, I firmly believe Mi Cai will return, because at the time of our parting, we redefined the coordinates of that Sky City. As long as we follow this as our guide, carrying the belief of staying together forever, there will surely come a day when our hardships turn into sweetness… And those hardships and temptations in life are nothing but weeds growing in the backyard, adding color to our lives and making our reunion more meaningful in reality.
While I was deep in thought, Leyao stood beside me, interrupting my train of thought, as she had already returned to Beijing two days ago. Looking at her wearing sunglasses and a mask, I asked, “Why are you back in Suzhou again?”
“I came because I had time… Mi Cai left, and Yan Yan also went to Shanghai with Jian Wei. There should always be someone around you who can support you.”
I smiled and replied, “It’s just life. I can handle it!”
“You really are capable. I never realized it before… You make it sound so easy!”
“I also think you’re really capable. You’re such a busy person, yet you specially took time to fly from Beijing to Suzhou just to tease me… Actually, life gets complicated because of people like you who meddle in everything!”
“Don’t argue with me. Don’t you have an appointment with Zhang Yixi to discuss the Literary Path project soon? It’s almost time. I’ll go with you.”
“How do you even know about this?!”
Leyao looked displeased and replied, “Have you forgotten that I also have a cooperative relationship with Zhang Yixi? He became the investor for my movie, and I became the spokesperson for his tourism project!”
I recalled that this was indeed the case and nodded, but still didn’t understand why she had come this time.
Leyao continued, “I came here this time to help negotiate more benefits for the Literary Path project with him… You know, don’t be too sentimental. In business, we should talk about business. You need to actively fight for your own interests… This is exactly what you should learn from Zhang Yixi, this merchant with a sharp eye for every detail. I’ve really experienced his meticulousness in this cooperation! Honestly, I’ve never seen such a stingy investor!”
I smiled and said, “Different projects bring different sentiments and investment attitudes. For your project, of course, profitability is the main goal. But the Literary Path project fulfills another investment need for him. I think he will perform differently.”
“Hmph! I really want to see what kind of change he will show. Actually, if it weren’t for you, I really wouldn’t want to see his penny-pinching face again. Despite his wife being so capable, he himself seems like he crawled out of a refugee camp. I feel like I’ve been really taken advantage of this time. You don’t know how persuasive he is. He talked so much that he painted a bright and promising future for our cooperation. At least he did invest real money into our project!”
“Stop complaining. Your contract hasn’t even been officially signed yet… Besides, I think you don’t really know him well, so please don’t rush to judge someone so quickly!”
“Hmph, I really want to see how this merchant will talk to you later.” Leyao said and walked toward the street to hail a taxi… I smiled at her back and couldn’t help but wonder: How could Zhang Yixi possibly take advantage of me? What could he possibly gain from this loss-making project? Actually, when we talk about cooperation, it’s just for the sake of our shared ideals, and the distribution of interests can be discussed later.
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