In the north, it snowed; in the south, it rained. The biggest difference this year compared to last was that the south had become even more like the south. This winter hadn’t brought as much snow as previous years, but the rain had increased. So once again, it was a rainy late night…
Inside Huifang Restaurant, the owners had disappeared, leaving only me, sober and alert, and Fangyuan, who was drunk. There was also an undefined deal he had proposed but hadn’t yet specified. He said he wanted to exchange a secret for my mercy.
I didn’t answer him. Instead, I tried to imagine what kind of fear he must be experiencing inside to make such an unequal and almost ridiculous proposal. Why should I sacrifice the investors’ interests and Mi Cai’s long-term planning for a secret? Why should I let him off the hook?
So I said to him, “Fangyuan, there’s no secret that can redeem a soul that has already been sold. So don’t try to make a deal with me. I can listen to your secret or I can choose not to. My life has already been unaffected by it—you should understand this better than anyone.”
Fangyuan looked at me with drunken eyes and then fell into a daze. He seemed to be listening to the sound of the rain outside, or perhaps thinking about something else. Eventually, he lowered his head, then lifted it again to finish an entire glass of baijiu. Along with the last sip, he also swallowed his final hope of me. His condition deteriorated rapidly, and he was on the verge of collapsing from drunkenness.
The rain kept falling, like curtains hanging from the eaves. In this enclosed space, I felt somewhat oppressed. Finally, I spoke again: “Don’t be so calculating in life. Don’t always try to negotiate conditions. There are things I was kept in the dark about, but that doesn’t mean you now have the right to bargain with me. I think what you should be thinking about most now is how to become an upright person in this world with principles. I’m leaving. Keep drinking.”
After saying this, I opened my umbrella and left. I continued searching for something to eat along the damp street. I seemed to see my shadow reflected in the rainwater, distorted by the lights from the alley, still stretching toward the “Huifang Restaurant,” making my steps heavy, as if trying to stop me from leaving… Suddenly, I realized: there was a burden in my heart, and it was still inside the “Huifang Restaurant.”
In the end, I still left in the rain. The burden that had always been in my heart couldn’t hold me back now, because I had already developed a thick skin and a hardened heart in this world full of right and wrong.
…
The next day, the rain continued to drizzle. The entire city had become melancholy under the persistent downpour. The dense clouds looked like angry faces ready to vent their frustration at everything on earth. After a simple lunch, I stood by the floor-to-ceiling window… I inexplicably felt anxious but couldn’t release it, until Yan Yan came into my office, and I finally managed to focus on work.
Yan Yan and I had another long conversation lasting nearly an hour. Because I wasn’t in a good state, I felt mentally and physically exhausted. But I had already prepared myself for her to bring up Fangyuan again after our conversation… I knew she still had feelings for him.
But this time, I misjudged the situation. Yan Yan didn’t intend to mention Fangyuan’s recent troubles at all. After checking the time, she said to me somewhat urgently: “Zhaoyang, let’s stop here today. I need to hurry to the marketing department to discuss next year’s advertising plan with Director Li. I must be back before three o’clock—Xiaohua has been drinking breast milk recently…”
I was somewhat taken aback, only then realizing that Yan Yan had already shifted her life’s focus to Xiaohua. To her, Fangyuan was perhaps just a pitiful passerby…
Finally, I showed my first smile of the day and said to her: “Go ahead. Director Li is in the office now. Both of you should hurry. I also have a monthly summary meeting with the marketing department later.”
“Okay, no more than half an hour!” After saying that, Yan Yan grabbed her handbag and hurried out of my office, then opened the door to the marketing department director’s office next door. At that moment, I truly felt that Yan Yan had completely let go of the nearly decade-long relationship and more than a year of marriage with Fangyuan!
I lit a cigarette, unsure of what exactly I was feeling, but I was genuinely happy for Yan Yan because her adherence to integrity had brought her a perfect family life!
Yes, I had never doubted Yan Yan’s character. This was evident from the time she gave up everything to care for Jian Wei like a family member for several months. Sometimes, even one’s closest family members might not be able to match her level of unwavering support for Jian Wei. Of course, after Jian Wei woke up, she gave her advertising company to Yan Yan. However, while Yan Yan worked hard to manage it, she also gave Jian Wei 30% of the company’s shares so that Jian Wei could continue living a comfortable material life…
Perhaps, I could say this: there is a kind of sisterly bond known as Yan Yan and Jian Wei!
…
After finishing the cigarette, my thoughts gradually calmed down, but the rain outside kept getting heavier. The wind hadn’t stopped either, blowing the trees on both sides of the street back and forth, making the entire city seem unstable, as if it were falling and swaying along with the cold wind and rain…
At some point, the door to my office was pushed open, and Fangyuan stood there looking somewhat disheveled. He must have spent a hellish night. I looked at him expressionlessly, while he looked at me full of remorse…
I calmly waited for him to speak, curious about what excuse he would use to convince me to give him a way out that I didn’t actually have in my hands.
He seemed to need to calm his emotions, so he took out a slightly wrinkled pack of cigarettes from his pocket, pulled one out, and skillfully put it in his mouth, but his hand trembled as he tried to light it…
Suddenly, I thought of Yan Yan, who was still discussing work in the marketing department next door. Both she and Fangyuan were now in my company, yet completely unaware of each other’s presence. It felt like a destined ending. Perhaps, in their dreams, they had never imagined that they would meet like this—being so close yet not meeting!
Fangyuan extinguished the cigarette in his hand. His eyes were slightly wet, but I couldn’t be sure whether his soul was also crying in remorse. I would never forget that it was this man in front of me who made me realize the truth about the ever-changing nature of human nature.
Was this a truth? Perhaps not. It was a depletion of trust, a helplessness in the face of life’s circumstances… Therefore, I could stand in front of him without any emotion.
The rain hadn’t stopped. The wind, blowing through the small gaps in the window, moved the hem of my clothes and messed up Fangyuan’s hair. Finally, with a painful gulp, he said to me: “Zhaoyang… I came here today only to sincerely apologize. I trampled on our long-standing friendship… I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I still hope you can forgive me. Because I don’t want to make the same mistake anymore, and I don’t want to hurt Mi Lan anymore. My recklessness caused her to lose our child… Now I just want to live a good life with her and make up for everything I’ve owed her. Perhaps we’ll have another child, and I will cherish it with my life…”
My emotions were complex, and I suddenly felt a slight softening in my heart. After all, Mi Cai’s action yesterday—acquiring the shares of Aisa Investment in Wansen in a rage—clearly showed how much she cared about her younger sister Mi Lan. For Mi Lan, having a Fangyuan who had repented and was determined to cherish her wholeheartedly was the greatest happiness, rather than the impending confrontation that would leave everyone hurt. I thought this was probably the outcome Mi Cai hoped for… But who could be sure that this wasn’t just a delaying tactic by Fangyuan, using Mi Lan as a shield?
In my anxiety, I lit another cigarette for myself…
Fangyuan then said to me in a low voice: “I know you don’t want to believe me now, but time can prove everything. I hope that in a few years, when you all accept me, I will have the opportunity to call Mi Cai and you ‘sister’ and ‘brother-in-law’ along with Mi Lan…”
The inner conflict made me feel tired. I closed my eyes, and everything around me fell into darkness. Then I heard Fangyuan say again: “Zhaoyang, the person who pushed Jian Wei downstairs was someone close to her, but he didn’t intend to kill her. His hired man just made a mistake… That’s all I can say. If you’re willing to give me another chance… I’ll wait for you at our university cafeteria the day after tomorrow at dusk. We can have a few drinks together again, like old times… Honestly, I’ve always admired your musical talent. If there’s a chance, I’d love to hear you sing ‘Seasons in the Sun’ for me again.”
“Seasons in the Sun”?
Before I could recall when I had sung that song for him, he had already left my office, and my world became quiet once again… Instinctively, I turned to look out the floor-to-ceiling window…
Two minutes later, I saw Fangyuan and Yan Yan walking out of the office building together. They had actually met by chance after all!
At that moment, a red Audi R8 came rushing from the lower left side of the building, directly targeting Fangyuan and Yan Yan. This terrifying suddenness left my mind blank. In a daze, I saw Fangyuan forcefully push Yan Yan aside, but he himself couldn’t dodge in time and was heavily hit by the car, flying and landing against the pillar at the entrance… Blood immediately mixed with the muddy rainwater, flowing toward Yan Yan’s feet…
The world suddenly seemed to turn into a silent movie… Everyone who witnessed this film wore expressions of fear and distortion…
I finally regained consciousness and recognized the car—it belonged to Mi Lan…
What had driven her to such an extreme?… I swear, this encounter between Fangyuan and Yan Yan wasn’t intentional. They were just accidentally meeting by chance…
I stumbled downstairs, but the cold wind brought with it a sense of dust returning to dust and earth returning to earth…
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