When Jian Wei asked about our past relationship, I felt a sense of confusion. Sometimes, I was even affected by Jian Wei’s state of forgetting the past, and my heart grew indifferent toward that once profound and unforgettable history between us. Yet at this moment, some lingering feelings from the past resurfaced, leaving me unable to find a suitable way to answer her.
“Zhaoyang, what exactly was our relationship in the past?”
Finally, I replied, “We were very close friends, which is why your father asked me to handle this matter for him… You haven’t answered me yet, which country do you want to go to?”
“I don’t want to go to any country at all…!”
I sensed some emotion in Jian Wei’s tone and asked with concern, “What’s wrong? Why don’t you want to live abroad?”
“I’m waiting for someone to come and pick me up.”
I roughly understood that the person Jian Wei referred to was Mo Zishi, so I replied, “Why must you wait for him to come and pick you up? If you like him, you could also go find him actively.”
“I’m not a person who takes initiative…” She paused and then looked at me before continuing, “Yanyan told me that if I had been more proactive back then, things wouldn’t have turned out like this. Since I was never a proactive person back then, why should I break my original character now? Let me wait a little longer; maybe he will come for me.”
Suddenly, a deep feeling arose in my heart. If Jian Wei had been more proactive after returning to China, and had given me an opportunity, perhaps we would have started anew regardless of everything. Or if I had expressed my feelings to her actively after our breakup, perhaps we would have reunited passionately despite our past grievances…
Unfortunately, neither of us is a proactive person, and together we created this situation that is hard to describe in words. Sometimes, I find myself wondering in a daze: what would it be like if the woman I married was Jian Wei, the one I had missed for countless times? But this is only imagination. What stands before me is an irreversible change of time and circumstances. Grounded in reality, there are very few images of the future left for me to imagine when I stand by Jian Wei’s side. Therefore, for me, she is a passerby who occupied most of my youth, while for her, who has lost her memories, I am merely a kind dog… nothing more!
Finally, I smiled and said to her, “I think Yanyan told you these things hoping you would be more proactive. But if you keep waiting passively like this, you might end up in an even worse situation. Aren’t you afraid? We both know that many opportunities are fleeting!”
“If happiness requires me to take initiative to fight for it, then I doubt whether it’s really happiness.”
Looking at her face, I was momentarily at a loss for words because she looked so stubborn at that moment, yet there seemed to be some truth in her words, making it hard for me to either refute or agree with her.
Seeing that I remained silent, Jian Wei lost the desire to continue. She sat on the edge of the bed and once again took out her tablet, trying various passwords to turn it on. I stood by the sofa watching her until she gave up and finally dismissed me. I then left the convalescent home where Jian Wei had lived for over half a year, stepping on the snow outside.
…
Tomorrow is the nationwide premiere day for Leyao’s new movie. Me and Rob were in a small tavern discussing her film. I had a bias against the sad ending of the movie and predicted that the film would not reach the expected box office revenue. Rob, however, held the opposite view. He believed that this ending was different from the clichéd plots in Korean dramas and was a highlight of the film—an artistic touch appreciated by those who could understand it.
Because of this, we had a heated debate and made a bet. If the movie eventually grossed over 400 million, I would dress as a woman during my next tour and sing the theme song Rob wrote for the film. Conversely, if it failed to reach 400 million, Rob would have to do this embarrassing act.
Perhaps because I had a few drinks, I brought up his personal life, a sensitive topic, and asked him, “The year is almost over, and you’re another year older. I really want to hear you tell me honestly: have you seriously considered settling down and starting a family?”
Rob took a sip of his drink and countered, “With whom should I settle down?”
“Come on, don’t be difficult. This shouldn’t be hard for you… You’ve seen it yourself, even CC has already gotten married. Some feelings can indeed be let go.”
“Then why don’t you let go and stop stubbornly waiting for Mi Cai to come back?”
“Aren’t you just arguing for the sake of arguing? Our situations are completely different!”
“In my opinion, they’re the same… Just stop talking nonsense. We’re both people who haven’t figured life out, and there’s absolutely no need to mock each other. Let’s drink. Alcohol is a good thing. Drink…” Saying this, Rob poured an entire glass of baijiu into his mouth. He was clearly getting drunk. I knew that since he last saw CC, his mood had been low. His tragedy in life was that when he needed Weimanwen the most, it was CC who was by his side, and when he needed CC, it was the already unfaithful Weimanwen who remained.
But when it comes to love, an irrational thing, all he could do was surrender helplessly and turn himself into a sorrowful donkey lost in confusion.
That night, I carried a completely drunk Rob into his apartment and, for convenience, lay down on his bed as well. When everything became quiet, I thought back to last year. Although at that time, Mi Cai and I weren’t particularly happy, we were at least together. Now, we are both in different countries, striving for our careers and achieving great success, but we are ultimately separated.
I also wondered when Mi Cai would feel that the time was right for her to return to China, and whether she could understand how unbearable my current days felt.
…
Three days later in the afternoon, Chen Jingming came to my office with a check worth 15 million yuan from the finance department. He handed the check to me and discussed recent work matters. We were both excited about the company’s strong development momentum.
I said to Chen Jingming, “Mr. Chen, I think the current conditions are mature enough. I plan to set up a professional online store for travel equipment on the internet platform, which will also serve as an initial preparation for the company’s entry into the e-commerce field.”
“Mr. Zhao, I actually think it’s unnecessary to conduct such small-scale testing. Right now is the period when our company’s reputation is at its peak. It’s not only easy to attract investment but also conducive to building a high-quality brand image… Therefore, I believe this is the best time for us to fully enter the e-commerce field. The products we sell should not be limited to travel goods only.”
I immediately disagreed, saying, “Mr. Chen, that would be too hasty. We haven’t established many of our supply channels yet. Although I’m very interested in the e-commerce field, I also have a clearer understanding of our company’s current situation… At this stage, we are not suitable for a full-scale entry into the e-commerce field. The resources we currently possess are far from comparable to those of Zhuomei. You could say that Zhuomei’s entry into e-commerce was the result of ten years of preparation, but us? We even need courage just to test the waters!”
Chen Jingming’s expression turned serious as he reminded me, “Mr. Zhao, it’s no longer Zhuomei now—it’s Wansen!”
“Sorry, that was a slip of the tongue… But you must understand my point. Moreover, fully entering the e-commerce field would require us to secure substantial investment. Do you have confidence in that?”
“We can seek cooperation with Mr. An’s Tianyang Group. Don’t you remember that last year, Tianyang wanted to invest in Zhuomei precisely to enter the e-commerce field?”
“Yes, Zhuomei had all the resources Tianyang needed for entering the e-commerce field, but what do we have? What do you expect me to bring to the negotiation table with Mr. An? Besides, if Tianyang had the money, they could simply do the project themselves. Why would they bother partnering with us?… Mr. Chen, I’m really puzzled. How could you, with your extensive work experience, make such a basic mistake?”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Zhao… Maybe it’s because I still hold a grudge over the Zhuomei matter! But I still insist on my opinion. I believe that as long as the company is determined, it can definitely succeed in this project. We must enter this field as soon as possible; otherwise, we will be left further and further behind by the traditional, established e-commerce companies…”
I replied sincerely, “Mr. Chen, I understand all that you’ve said… and I’m also willing to give it a try. However, I cannot guarantee the outcome because no investor would dare to pour so much money into a company like ours, which has almost no resources in the e-commerce field.”
…
After finishing my conversation with Chen Jingming, I was troubled by the problem of resource scarcity. I truly wanted to fully enter the e-commerce field, but unfortunately, we were ultimately just a company engaged in the tourism industry. The possibility of such a transformation was practically nonexistent. Still, I was willing to give it a try. I had long realized that I would inevitably face a direct confrontation with Fang Yuan in this field. For me, this was not only an opportunity but also the greatest challenge of my life.
When I got off work, I called Manager Sun and arranged to meet him at a teahouse, planning to ask him to return the 15 million yuan to the anonymous person who had helped us initially. I also hoped that after repaying the money, he might feel less burdened and reveal the identity of the person who had assisted Simi Advertising.
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