Chapter 269: Lingering Feelings

In the night, I held Jian Wei and walked towards the residential community where she lived. At that moment, I was truly grateful that Jian Wei had told me her address before she lost consciousness; otherwise, I wouldn’t have known what to do with her.

After entering the community, I discovered she lived on the sixth floor, meaning there was no elevator. I felt disheartened and had no choice but to lean her against the wall while my arms ached from numbness.

After resting briefly, I picked Jian Wei up again and started climbing the stairs. After walking a few steps, I remembered that I hadn’t checked the message Mi Cai had sent me earlier.

But why hadn’t I thought about it during the rest? Probably, in my subconscious, I didn’t really mind Xuran going to America, so I wasn’t particularly concerned about what Mi Cai might reply.

I took the key from Jian Wei’s handbag, opened the door, and stumbled inside, laying her gently on the sofa in the living room.

Finally, I turned on the living room light, poured myself a glass of water, and leaned back on the sofa in the most relaxed posture possible, trying to recover my exhausted body.

…

After finishing the glass of water, I took out my phone again and opened the message from Mi Cai.

“Yes, he came to the US. There’s a part of the project that requires cooperation from the investors, and his company is now one of the largest investors of Zhuomei.”

I smiled and replied, “Why are you explaining so thoroughly?”

“Because I’m afraid you might mind!”

“I don’t mind.”

Mi Cai sent back a sad emoji without any words.

“Why are you sad?”

“You don’t care about me at all! That’s why you don’t mind!”

Instinctively, I wiped the cold sweat from my forehead. It turned out Mi Cai could also view love with this kind of typical female logic.

Still pondering what kind of message I should send to calm her down, Jian Wei’s phone rang from inside her handbag.

I had no intention of answering it and continued replying to Mi Cai’s message, but the ringing persisted.

I was afraid it might be an urgent work-related call, so I finally got up, picked up the handbag from the sofa where she was, searched through several compartments, and found the phone. However, the moment I saw the caller ID, I froze instantly—it was Xiang Chen calling.

I hesitated about whether to answer it, but ultimately, there was no reason for me to do so. It was so late, Jian Wei was drunk, and me being with her would only cause misunderstandings.

After ringing several times, the phone finally stopped, but I didn’t feel any sense of relief.

Just as I was about to put the phone back into Jian Wei’s handbag, a message notification popped up again. I glanced at it instinctively. It was still from Xiang Chen: “Weiwei, can you please answer my call? Can you not be so cold to me anymore?… I’m on my way to Suzhou now, and I’ll arrive at your place in ten minutes. I hope you’ll open the door for me so we can talk things through properly. Okay?”

I was stunned for about 30 seconds before suddenly realizing I had only 9 and a half minutes left to leave. I quickly put the phone back into Jian Wei’s handbag, didn’t even look back, and rushed out the door.

…

In the night, I returned to the riverside again. I had never felt life so absurdly ridiculous before. Why did I have to escape from Jian Wei’s home in such a pitiful manner?

Was it because I already had Mi Cai, or because Jian Wei now had Xiang Chen?

Perhaps neither. It was simply because those days of openness and honesty from the past had already died in the slow poison of time.

Feeling deeply oppressed, I lit a cigarette and suddenly remembered I hadn’t replied to Mi Cai’s message yet. However, torn between two emotional struggles, I had completely lost the mood to respond. Eventually, I truly threw my phone aside and just sat there, emotionless.

Suddenly, the message Xiang Chen had sent to Jian Wei popped into my mind again. I didn’t even need to think hard to know that there must be another conflict between them, and that she had once again ignored him coldly.

I wasn’t stupid. Combining Jian Wei’s recent behavior and actions, I deeply realized that perhaps there was still unresolved affection between us!

However, there were many things that couldn’t be explained.

If Jian Wei truly still loved me, why did she accept Xiang Chen’s confession on that day at Fang Yuan and Yan Yan’s wedding?

And why had she insisted so firmly on breaking up with me back in the US, without even giving a reason?

When these two questions overwhelmed me, my mind went blank. Then I thought of Mi Cai again. If I kept trying to figure out the unresolved doubts between Jian Wei and me, wouldn’t that be disrespectful to her?

Thinking this way, my mind went blank once more.

However, one thing was undeniable: what I had previously believed—that I no longer loved Jian Wei—was based solely on the assumption that she no longer loved me.

Once I sensed the possibility that she might still love me, that half-dead heart seemed to instantly regain the motivation to love again.

Because a heart that has been genuinely given cannot simply be taken back at will.

Three years of unforgettable memories, followed by another three years of longing day and night! If these six years had been a kind of poison, I truly lacked the ability to cure myself of it.

I felt lost, not knowing what to do, only able to drift helplessly through the wind, through the rain, through these absurd yet passionately loving years…

I returned to the old house Mi Cai had left for me. My body found the comfort of home, but my soul felt as if it were being lashed by Mi Cai’s pure whip.

Finally, I felt I couldn’t stay there any longer. After watering the plants and flowers on the balcony, I hurriedly left the old house and called Luo Ben. At this moment, I wanted to talk with him, my similarly afflicted buddy.

Luo Ben told me he had moved back to his old, simple rooftop room.

That was even better, at least I wouldn’t have to face CC, who was closest to Mi Cai.

Shortly after, I arrived at Luo Ben’s place. Without knocking, I took out a bank card from my wallet, slid it into the old lock, and opened the door. There I saw Luo Ben lying on the bed, expressionless, smoking a cigarette.

I kicked the bed slightly, and he turned his head to look at me, then put out the cigarette in his hand and asked, “Damn, you’re good! How did you get in?”

I waved the bank card in my hand.

Luo Ben didn’t speak further but threw me a cigarette.

I didn’t light it but held it between my fingers and asked him, “Why did you move back here again?”

As if it were an instinctive reaction, Luo Ben replied, “I missed her.”

I pretended to be surprised and said, “Man, how could you do this to CC?” I looked at him with a hint of longing, because his answer might help me understand my own confusion.

Luo Ben looked at me for a while before saying slowly, “Even if I feel guilty, I still miss her… She’s in my bones!”

After a while, I gritted my teeth and nodded slightly.

Luo Ben looked at me warily and asked, “What? Are you here to stand up for CC?”

I shook my head and said, “Everyone in the world has the right to slap you two for what you’ve done to CC, except me!”

Luo Ben nodded with an expression of understanding and said, “You’re right, you don’t have the right!”

I didn’t say anything else, just sat on the chair beside the bed, finally lit the cigarette I had been holding, and smoked silently with Luo Ben.

Then my phone rang. It was a long-distance call from Mi Cai. Until now, I still hadn’t replied to her message.