Mi Cai and Jian Wei, who was singing on the stage, almost simultaneously noticed each other’s presence, but their eyes did not linger on each other, not even a nod of greeting. Actually, this wasn’t a big deal, considering they had only met a few times.
This time, Mi Cai didn’t come to my side but went to CC and Roben’s area instead.
Yanyan asked me in puzzlement, “Why didn’t she greet you after coming here?”
“You said women have those days when they don’t feel like doing anything, right? Maybe she’s having one of those days and just couldn’t be bothered to greet me,” I offered what I thought was a decent explanation.
Yanyan rolled her eyes at me and said, “Zhao Yang, your mouth is truly something else. I think she’s probably bothered that I came with Jian Wei.”
I glanced toward Mi Cai and nodded, “Maybe. She’s just not very sociable.”
Yanyan nodded and didn’t say anything else. On stage, Jian Wei had finally finished singing a song. However, the audience refused to let her go and strongly requested another song. CC also joined in with the crowd, so Jian Wei sang another one. This time, she sang “Rushing Away,” a song I had sung countless times when we were together. As soon as the intro started, my emotions began to surge.
Unlike my heart-wrenching rendition, Jian Wei sang it softly, almost expressionlessly, delivering it in a very calm manner.
Suddenly, Yanyan nudged me and said, “Zhao Yang, can I tell you something privately?”
“What is it?”
Yanyan hesitated briefly before saying, “It’s about Jian Wei and Xiang Chen.”
“What about them?”
After another pause, Yanyan told me, “They haven’t been getting along very well recently…”
My emotions started churning again, but I calmly replied, “Is that so?”
“Mm.” Yanyan nodded and sighed, “Jian Wei wants to work on her own, but Xiang Chen absolutely refused to agree. Eventually, he simply handed her a check for two million yuan, trying to dissuade her from working… He just doesn’t understand her!”
After listening to Yanyan, I looked toward the stage where Jian Wei was, feeling more confused than ever. Wasn’t the life of luxury and comfort that Xiang Chen provided exactly what she wanted? And wasn’t she dissatisfied with the life we once had together? Then what kind of life was she really pursuing?
I didn’t have the answer, so I didn’t respond to Yanyan. I just sat there smoking silently, and after a while, I asked, “Are they in a cold war now?”
Yanyan nodded and said, “Yes, but Xiang Chen has been the one trying to make up with her. Jian Wei is also very conflicted, but her stance is clear—she insists on working and refuses to be a housewife… Xiang Chen is really being unreasonable. Doesn’t he realize that she studied in the U.S. for three years? How could she possibly be content being a housewife?”
Before I could respond, Jian Wei had already come down from the stage and sat across from us, bringing an abrupt end to my conversation with Yanyan.
The audience started shouting for someone else to sing next. I thought it might be CC’s turn, but instead, Mi Cai and Roben walked toward the stage together. It seemed Mi Cai had invited Roben to sing. I wasn’t particularly surprised, as she had mentioned many times before that she admired Roben. Still, I was curious about what song they would choose. Typically, male-female duets were love songs, and Roben, as a folk singer with deep artistic integrity, had never been seen singing mushy love songs with any woman over the years.
On the stage, Mi Cai and Roben each strummed their guitars to find their rhythm, exchanged a glance, and then I heard the intro of “Clearly My Heart” being played by them on their guitars.
I stared blankly at the two on stage, feeling as if Roben’s dignity had shattered into pieces. He was actually singing such a mushy love song…
I looked toward CC, who shrugged helplessly, clearly also shocked by Roben’s uncharacteristic behavior. Perhaps this was the power of beauty, something even Roben couldn’t resist.
It was bad enough that they were singing love songs, but they kept exchanging glances as well. I felt Roben’s dignity crumbling even further. After all, I had met Mi Cai first, yet I had never had the chance to sing a duet with her, let alone a love song. I felt even more strongly that Roben’s dignity had been reduced to dust!
Halfway through Mi Cai and Roben’s performance, Jian Wei and Yanyan stood up one after another and said to me, “We’re leaving first.”
“Aren’t you going to stay a bit longer?”
Jian Wei didn’t say anything, and Yanyan smiled and said, “No, we have an appointment at a beauty salon, and it’s almost time.”
I nodded and didn’t try to stop them. I stood up and walked them outside the bar, watched them get into the car, and finally saw them disappear from my sight.
I felt a bit empty and didn’t want to go back into the bar immediately. I lit a cigarette and stood outside in the cold, damp air where the snow and ice had not yet melted.
I gradually calmed down and thought again about what Yanyan had told me when Jian Wei was away. I wondered, could Jian Wei and Xiang Chen really make it to the end?
Perhaps they could, because Xiang Chen deeply loved Jian Wei and would tolerate her.
I thought of my past self again. It seemed that it was always Jian Wei who tolerated me more. From this perspective, perhaps Jian Wei would be happier with Xiang Chen.
…
When I returned to the bar, Mi Cai and Roben were still enthusiastic and started singing another love song. This time, I sat with CC.
I took a sip of beer and remarked, “They’re really in a good mood today, singing love songs back-to-back!”
CC smiled and asked for my opinion, “How about after they finish, we also go up and sing a few songs together?”
“How many songs? Not enough! At least more than them, and we should sing those kind of desperately romantic songs!”
CC rolled her eyes at me and said, “Come on, Zhao Yang! They only sang two songs together, and your jealousy is already overflowing. I can’t sing those kind of desperately romantic songs!”
“Do I seem jealous? Well, if you don’t want to sing, it’s fine. Then let’s just listen to them sing and see how long they can go!”
As I was speaking, Roben and Mi Cai finished their second song. They politely thanked each other and walked back toward my and CC’s area.
Before Roben and Mi Cai had even sat down, CC suddenly said to Mi Cai, “Sweetie, Zhao Yang just said he wants to sing with you. Do you want to rest a bit first or sing with him now?”
Although I knew CC was saying this on purpose, I didn’t expose her intentions, and instead waited with a bit of hope for Mi Cai’s response.
Mi Cai didn’t even look at me and said, “Who wants to sing with him!”
I immediately felt annoyed and said, “Don’t act like I’m dying to sing with you. I can’t even sing those desperately romantic songs.”
Mi Cai immediately retorted, “Exactly, you can’t sing them. You just like singing songs like ‘Rushing Away’!”
Suddenly, I realized that she had been present when I sang “Rushing Away” last time, and she had also come and heard Jian Wei sing “Rushing Away” this time. But what was the connection?
I extended my thinking further. Why did Jian Wei choose this song tonight? Was she trying to express something?
After thinking about it, I quickly dismissed the idea. “Rushing Away” was the second song Jian Wei sang tonight, and she only sang it because the audience strongly requested it. Originally, she hadn’t planned to sing a second song. If she really wanted to express something, she should have sung this song right from the start. Besides, she just liked the song, and it didn’t have any special meaning, because I remembered she didn’t show even the slightest emotional change while singing it.
So I warned myself not to think too much: Jian Wei and I were truly in the past, and nothing would happen between us again, ever.
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